Friday Ephemera (690)
“Hold the top of the tip and shake all the filling down.” As one does. || Snugly fitting pieces. || They’re just checking your air filters. || Ancient artefact. || I did not know that ladies had four breasts. || Big teats ahoy. || Brains trust at large. Previously. || Pregnancy of note. || Continue the research. || Discrimination, you say. || “That could be a true story.” || These cupcakes are fancier than yours. || Parking 2.0. || You want one and you know it. || It was 1973. || || How to please a progressive. || A project for the weekend. (h/t, Mark) || The progressive retail experience, parts 486, 487, 488, 489 and 490. And 491, 492, 493, 494 and 495. || Correcting basic errors in class is “white racial superiority.” || And finally, with some vigour, whatever it is he was planning to do, it did not go smoothly.
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Bless you, sir,
May those dearest to you never, after four hours of intricate yet strangely satisfying work assembling a gas-powered barbecue, find themselves at the last minute unable to connect the gas bottle, due to the manufacturer having supplied the product with substandard jubilee clips.
And to head off the inevitable silly remarks: “substandard jubilee clips” does not sound like a band name.
It sounds like a critically acclaimed but commercially underwhelming third album.
“…jubilee clips…” Oh. Hose clamps.
Meanwhile, next to be sacrificed on the altar or wokeness, Carlos Santana.
That, that whole thread. Every comment. Pretty much sums up what is wrong with men today. Such pitifully sad and meaningless creatures.
Well at least one demographic is taking COVID masking seriously.
I want that cube.
Morning, all.
You can buy them. Unsurprisingly, they ain’t cheap.
I rather like the “readers added context” panel:
Heh.
He has goals.
What scary is it’s strange to see everyone being so polite.
Also $4 a ticket!
Why, yes, it is on YouTube.
It’s just so much worse than you could possibly imagine.
So atrocious in fact that I wouldn’t be at all surprised to discover it had been written by Gates himself.
Yes, the juxtaposition of unspeakable horror and good manners definitely adds something.
I remember when a schoolfriend’s dad bought one of the early video recorders, an expensive indulgence at the time, and a copy of Alien. Both of which we were forbidden from touching. This point was impressed upon us in very serious tones. Naturally, days later, we bunked off school for the afternoon and watched it with great excitement. And the following day, boasted to our classmates of how brilliant it was and, by implication, how enormously cool we were.
If memory serves, we coasted on that for days.
Heh. They were simpler times.
Previously
All I could think of was how effective a baseball bat could be to handle that.
Readers are invited to devise morally fitting consequences for ferals who find amusement in repeatedly terrifying random motorists and pedestrians.
What’s scary to me is the glib attitude of the parents about taking quite young children to such a dark and frightening movie. That Narrative is far more chilling to me in a could be a true story context from 1978.
OTOH, I remember taking a date and making out through the whole thing. Hey, you gotta do what you can and let Mother Nature do the rest. We were barely 17 after all.
She could just use a sock. Or not bother and just take stronger medication.
Somewhere, there must be a subreddit where the regulars argue about how a specially-made ‘packer’ is much more validating. I mean, using a sock would just be silly. And we can’t have that.
In related news, don’t forget your O-ring.
Is it wrong for me to want them all to fail to reach orbit, blowing up on the launch pad?
I can think of many.
However, our “liberal” friends have already devised harsh punishments for anyone who describes these sadistic creatures as ferals and savages. So it is fair to also ponder fitting consequences for “liberals”.
That’s the thing. It is malevolent, and obviously so. What we’re seeing – and these videos are legion – isn’t just reckless larking about. It isn’t high spirits. It’s intended to intimidate and distress random people. Because that’s what the ferals enjoy doing. It’s a sense of power.
Anyone who’s been in a car accident, even a near miss, will know how alarming it is, especially if you’ve injured someone, or think you may have. The point of the swerve game is to abuse motorists who have some capacity for conscience. And it’s generally played by those who don’t have that capacity. (If the game didn’t frighten the victims, if they just kept on driving with indifference, I doubt it would be played with such enthusiasm.)
To say nothing of the videos showing pedestrians, including the elderly, getting hit and left sprawled on the pavement by the same spiteful, laughing morons.
The Progressive Minded Thinkers who refuse to recognize this are themselves just as morally defective, and society would benefit from their removal just as much as from the removal of the ferals.
He has goals.
He wants a uterus transplant. Then in-vitro fertilization. Then the first trans woman abortion.
File that under “stunning and brave.” Not depraved at all.
Wife says no.
Found at Roswell?
sock puppet: Apparently, these women have never seen an actual penis because these socks/things are much much too big.
haircut: not letting a robot that close to my head, thankyouverymuch
correcting grammar: I have had black friends who had quite good grammar…except they said axe for ask. Nothing like being incoherent to give employers confidence in your ability to do the job. The woke do not want blacks to succeed, they just want the rest of us to fail.
He wants a uterus transplant.
This was done at Oxford, by a team of nine, and a total of 30 staff for the ludicrously lowball figure of only 25,000 Imperial Dollars.
However, it was between two sisters, so the fundamental anatomy and plumbing were already there.
Minor details, barely an inconvenience.
All the other transplants were also woman to woman, not woman to a Potemkinwoman (not that they aren’t thinking of it for the “affirmation”) and I’ve not found (briefly searching) decent results* on the kid of immunosupressive meds.
There has to be a “no mas” moment or next on the docket of procedures that don’t need to be done will be prostate transplants for the “affirmation”.
*(Though it doesn’t look too rosy)
“Based on science.”
That theatre has had its ups and downs over the years.
It reminded me of the Eurythmics’ Missionary Man music video.
I want the under-car variant for when driving through “vibrant” neighborhoods.
Reality is not their métier.
I want the under-car variant for when driving through “vibrant” neighborhoods.
I believe you mean one of these, which may also be why there are no reports of bicycle idiocy out of South Africa.
See also, for instance, this. Not least the following,
A question we’ve found ourselves asking more than once.
[ Loud shushing sound from male readers. ]
However, it was between two sisters, so the fundamental anatomy and plumbing were already there.
It’s an amazing accomplishment. And thankfully the procedure is out of reach for that gentleman with “goals.”
So far, at least.
Heh. Perceptions of those whose experience includes watching porn to determine averages won’t at all be affected by self selection bias, nosiree!
A small, distant, island with no company but other of their ilk.
Snugly fitting…
The technique is EDM, electrical discharge machining. Often mentioned at r/Machinists.
It works because there are no forces on the tool or workpiece that might affect the tolerances.
but the really amazing thing is, the two parts are not made by a single slicing operation, but separately. Maintaining that precision is tremendously non-trivial.
Think I’ll send this to my liberal in-laws.
Also applies to non-functional meat tubes fashioned from a lady’s arm and leaving her scarred for life in a highly visible area as the price for creating something that no normal person will ever willingly cast eyes on let alone touch.
In such cases the dick-in-a-bag or upmarket sock-sac would clearly be preferable were it not for the psychotic need for self-harm as a way of attracting attention.
(Please Sir. I’ve messed up my italics).
So I see.
[ Fixes unsightly HTML, mutters under breath. ]
For future reference, you don’t need to include any HTML tags. Just use the comment box formatting toolbar. Highlight the text you want to italicise, hyperlink or blockquote, etc., then click the relevant button.
[ Awaits curmudgeonly noises from Muldoon. ]
Gad Saad on Jordan Peterson’s Ontario Court-mandated re-education training:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VtpYEBvU0gg
I dare say that I am noticing a theme — an idée fixe, if one will, quite, rather — in the progressive retail experience videos.
There is, lest we forget, a third, er, sturdier option.
Ladies, avert your eyes.
[ Awaits curmudgeonly noises from Muldoon. ]
The edit thing is still banjaxed…
Also applies to non-functional meat tubes…
Want a non-functional meat tube but keep your OEM naughty bits? Good News Everyone! “Non-binary” surgery is here for you “affirmation”.
[ Awaits Disqus fix with increasing impatience. ]
Instead of greeting home invaders with a fusillade of bullets, how about miniature Claymore mines under the welcome mat?
Previously.
That thing that never happens just happened again.
And remember, dear readers, “Genital preferences are transphobic.”
How is that statement (the one in the link) not homophobic?
Want a non-functional meat tube but keep your OEM naughty bits? Good News Everyone! “Non-binary” surgery is here for you “affirmation”.
Like the Island of Dr. Moreau, I eagerly await the time when “Dr.” Crane’s sexual monstrosities turn on their depraved creator.
[ Fixes up-buggered HTML. Points to earlier comment. ]
WpDiscuz update, with a fix for that particular issue, expected shortly.
Heh. Would watch.
We who wait.
I pictured this.
If the fix arrives, imagine a 60’s photo of hysterically crying Beatles fans.
I don’t know if you posted it before, since the video is four months old, but using cats to illustrate critical mass.
I think I got this from Ace but apologies (see, I can be nice) if it was posted earlier here. If society must be run by 12 year old girls, I vote for this one. How DARE you!
Cleavage scenes.
Not unfair.
This literally made me laugh out loud.
(The more so as apparently the 1996 film version was by all accounts a monumental disaster, as recounted here by Critical Drinker)
Lol. True story.
It’s not, I can confirm, an uncommon occurrence.
Though the phenomenon really kicks in when cyclists cluster. The grouping does seem to engender a disregard for other road users. As noted here:
One might, I think, contrast this experience, and numerous variations, with that of encountering horse riders on the same country roads – and which, being even slower and requiring lots of clearance, you’d think might be more aggravating to motorists, but which rarely provoke the same irritation. In my experience, horse riders are much more likely to be considerate than cyclists, especially groups of cyclists, and to have that courtesy repaid.
Since sitting for his portrait, the avalanche of Trump memes continues apace, some very witty indeed. I wonder if our host might reserve a spot for a tasteful treasury of same.
Indeed.
Although to be fair I have witnessed arrogant and irresponsible drivers, too. Cyclists can be obey all traffic laws and be supremely courteous and still run into trouble with car-driving jerks.
Absolutely. Though, again, as noted in the thread linked above:
My impression is, in this regard, there’s an asymmetry.
There’s some doofus with a scooter here in my small Appalachian mountain town who apparently lives near me. Well we turn down the same feeder road. Full throttle I’m guessing the thing does maybe 35 mph? Of course the road leading up to our common feeder road has a speed limit that varies 45-55 mph. Much of it is for lane but about three or four times now, as we approach our common feeder road the main one narrows down to two lanes for about a half mile. Where the speed limit is 55 heading out of town. There is plenty of shoulder to pull over and let someone pass without having to slow down. But no, not this guy. The whole road is his by rights by God.
I used to cycle. It wasn’t a cyclist per say. I had a decent racing bike with the skinny tires. Every once in a while, especially back in to 80’s, some idiot, usually a woman…most of whom have very little spacial awareness and thus drive in perpetual fear of hitting something…ahem…would pull up behind me, regardless of space available on the road (note, I would not ride on busy, tight streets streets), lay on the horn and point to the sidewalk. Or something similar. My wife’s ex-boyfriend was a cyclist so we are somewhat friendly to the concept. I used to do triathlons so I did some limited bike training. About the early/mid 90’s I gave it up. It was quite obvious what complete a-holes bikers were becoming and it was clear drivers were, justifiably IMNSHO, becoming quite irritated. I decided to give it up. Wasn’t worth the risk.
ooh, and the talking thing. The community I just moved out of was rather bike friendly, but mostly just Saturday and Sunday mornings. They would pass us when out for our morning walks and my God the chatter. And the big production about safety when approaching an intersection. This in a garden walled home community where people’s backyards faced a road, so cyclist chatter was easily heard when sitting in your home having brunch. It wasn’t that it was a bother per se as people walking…especially women…especially at 5 AM, though I was always up by then…could be heard as well. It was the obvious rudeness. The obvious attention seeking.
Oh yes indeed. Exactly why this is I am not sure, but it does seem that cyclists were much different when I was just a kid. Somehow the culture changed.
Cyclists can obey all traffic laws and be supremely courteous…
On another planet, perhaps.
Meanwhile someone who conducts…
…claims…
Eradicating.
Ozempic™ is literally the new Zyklon B.
On this planet: I was almost doored by a driver who got angry and threatened me when I merely yelled “watch out!” And I was almost hit by another jerk. And I have, all my life, religiously obeyed the traffic laws and safety advice for cyclists. But then, I have been nearly run over by idiot drivers when crossing the street, too. I was withing three inches of going under one woman’s wheels, who then stopped and looked back stupidly at me. And another woman became angry when I yelled and glared at her for almost running me down as she sped out of a parking facility. And then there were the male drives who showed every indication of being ready to get out and assault me for not wanting to be endangered by irresponsible fools….
Horse riders are, by and large, not smug.
Quite. Ditto large agricultural vehicles. It’s not uncommon to see them on country roads, but I’ve yet to see, say, a tractor driver showing an obvious attitude.
The tendency of adult cyclists, I don’t mind the kids so much, to zoom along on pavements does little for their popularity.
The same applies to grown men riding “e-scooters” – a name about as unconvincing as when they collect dolls but call them action figures.
The lovely park where I take my morning walks has clear “no cycling” signs at every entrance. Lycra clad wankers still ignore them so groups of us emulate the road cyclists referred to in other posts by walking 5 or 6 abreast. There’s a pond close by the side of the path if they’re in a real hurry to get past but to date at least we have sadly not achieved involuntary immersion.
Ooh, what’s this? I like cleavage scenes…
….
….
OH MY FUCKING GOD MY EYES MY EYES I HATE YOU
…
…
Note to self: You don’t like cleavage scenes.
[ Adds another chalk mark to scoreboard. ]
Apparently I tried editing too quickly, and now my comment is no longer available to edit.
So you’ll have to just imagine the spikily wittled improvidence I would have odoured to my cormorant.
[ Rummages in store room for bigger scoreboard. ]
No refunds; credit note only.
[slides jar of pickled eggs down the bar to Karl]
Unscrew the lid and they’ll walk down with a disturbing swagger.
Speaking of cleavage scenes…
She’s back. Another school board, just next door to the Halton District School Board, thought it would be a good idea to hire Kayla Lemieux.
Well. That changes things. Regardless as to what I’ve expressed about this guy/situation in the past, I would like to formally go on record right now by saying that I have no opinion here. That’s right. There is nothing that bothers me about this one way or the other. I am above the fray. High, high above the fray. So high my nose is bleeding. Damn it. This is a brand new shirt. Well this sucks.
Ah, repressive tolerance at its finest.
You will submit to the enforced admiration of criminals, perverts, deviants, paedophiles and all manner of weirdos.
We will not, however, tolerate traditional morals or values, since these represent white cishetropatriachal supremacy. Boo!
Or spelling. And proper grammar.
They represent oppression too. Boooooo!
Radical feminist vandalizes the Iliad and Odyssey
The Observer (The Guardian‘s Sunday edition) has finally noticed what they call “a new mood of lawlessness” that is now “out of control” in outlets such as the one in 490 there.
As the bizarre reference to an almost unprecedented crime wave as a “mood” suggests, the piece turns out to be very, very … Guardiany.
Spoiler alert: The piece concludes with the author’s preferred solution to “the progressive retail experience”. As one might expect, she eschews seemingly more obvious countermeasures in favour of one that is completely oblivious to the maximum inconvenience to the innocent and law-abiding her solution is bound to result in.
Says Ms Gill, confidently,
Except, of course, pretty much every study on the subject notes that the majority of shoplifting is not done out of need, but rather for kicks, or status, or for black market resale, including the aforementioned baby formula. By most estimates, shoplifters are on average caught around 2% of the time, usually after dozens of thefts, and of those apprehended, roughly half are turned over to the police for prosecution. And that’s before taking into account the recent thieving sprees documented in the Progressive Retail Experience series.
Ms Gill is not alone, of course. According to her Guardian colleague Owen Jones, expecting persistent shoplifters to face consequences for their actions is now among “the worst instincts of the electorate.” Because shoplifters are “traumatised,” apparently. The real victims.
If thieving is so high-minded and so easily excused, perhaps Ms Gill and Mr Jones would be good enough to publish their home addresses, the whereabouts of any valuables, and the times when they’re likely to be out. Or do our betters only disdain other people’s property?
Here’s a novel solution to the problem of theft. If people are likely to steal a product, just don’t sell it. See how that works? Bet none of you dumb, dumb dummies (why does ‘dumb’ have a ‘b’ in it but ‘dummies’ ain’t got one?) couldn’t have thought of that. Takes years of business school and experience and knowledge. Of course it was pretty stupid of them to ever sell such products in the first place. Now that I think of it, they all prolly oughtta be fired for ever letting such unprofitable items be made available on their shelves.
…the piece turns out to be very, very … Guardiany.
Of course, automation, so obvious a cause, not at all failed policies.
Of course our opinion is correct, all the time.
Because our rehashed, stale, boilerplate is not at all a bubble.
There is Guardiany, and weapons grade Guardiany.
Her own article, in the second paragraph, links to an earlier story which reports that:
That story itself strikes me as an abomination, involving as it does the upmarket stores Waitrose and John Lewis having to bribe the police with the offer of free coffee to do their job, or just anything useful.
How successful that is what with the police’s hectic schedule intimidating members of the public for “non-hate crimes” such as reposting spicy memes on social media or daring to suggest that some women might actually be men, and, incredibly, standing in the street doing nothing.
Meanwhile, 490, there is apparently quite happy to be filmed by his friends and neighbours, not wearing a mask, and mockingly taunts the powerless Co-op staff with:
In the face of that, Gill’s solution is to blame the stores for making their goods too easy to pilfer.
That’s literally the dim-witted tart’s conclusion.
What her conclusion ignores is that for 50 years, possibly more, there are parts of British cities in which local corner stores have ‘windows’ and entrances resembling the grille of a Teutonic knight’s helmet and where the tills use those sliding box trays of the type normally found in prisons.
It may well be effective in reducing incidents of shop-lifting, but it also punishes every other resident, especially the elderly and vulnerable, by increasing their fear and anxiety levels, by cutting them off from the kind of small talk with the staff that might be their only human contact that week.
Let her try and spend six months in one of those areas and see whether she wants that to be rolled out across the whole of the country or not because more robust (or frankly just any) policing and tougher sentencing “are exactly the wrong approach.”
Oh, and leave the bottle, will you?
I’ll be needing it.
The idea, it seems, is that the rest of us should resign ourselves to ever more social degradation, and being increasingly alienated from our own neighbourhoods, because actually punishing wrongdoers is terribly unfashionable.
Just this once, although it pains me to say it, I believe she has a point. Bottles of wine or spirits on an open display shelf that close to the exit, as opposed to the usual impulse buy crisps or chocolate, does seem particularly unwise even allowing for the bare-faced cheek of the Mizzy wannabe and probably also the other young man who exits a few seconds earlier with an extraordinarily full rucksack.
She’s an idiot:
And the use of keyless entry has increased it again. Technology is always a two-edged sword.
Alienation is one of the goals.
And yet at one time this was not a problem. The change is in large part due to changes forced by people like her.
I do chuckle at the handwringer’s lament of “it (the merchandise) goes to online sales”, as if one were to police the interwebs… well.
No. Go thru the ‘hood, and you’ll soon see that most of the stuff is in the hands of the community at large. It’s a sight to see name brand goods in the hands at the local food/backpack/everything else start of the skool year giveaways (and the fights. Constant fights).
This isn’t about any “cause” – this is in the same class as Lindesfarne. The barbarians are inside the walls, and our “leadership” class is encouraging them…
We are living in interesting times (that are becoming more, well… interesting)
There is Guardiany, and weapons grade Guardiany.
The last paragraph strikes me as un-Guardiany:
Un-Guardiany, because people who left school at 16 robustly enforcing a majority consensus on public order with the certainty that the majority has the right to enforce its own norms about having nice places to live … in Guardian terms, the jackbooted street muscle of the fascists. Working class people from the same neighborhoods or the same kinds of neighborhoods as the petty criminals enforcing order for nice middle class people who can’t deal with those types. In old Guardian terms, class traitors, in new Guardian terms, Deano.
The article mentions automation as a cause. It’s also casualization and subcontracting, so that the custodians don’t get to feel custodial about their spaces. It’s the fact that the jobs are often done by recent immigrants who can’t navigate the complexities and don’t have any stake. It’s another blessing of ethnic diversity: incompatible norms about noise and rambunctiousness in public spaces, and tricky “community” problems for park keepers telling kids to get off the grass.
Think of it as the sack of Rome in slow motion.