Speaking, as we were, of Clown Quarter academics and their relentless intellectual thrusting, I bring you this:

A PhD researcher is “investigating pole dancers’ digital media practices,” with funding from the taxpayer, the Telegraph can reveal. 

“Digital media practices” sounds so much more scholarly than, say, tarts who use OnlyFans. Oh, and Instagram. Naturally, this is being done “through an intersectional feminist framework.” One that “centres lived experience.” So lofty stuff, and rigorous to boot.

The researcher behind this colossal undertaking informs us,

“As someone who frequently practices pole dancing for recreational purposes and also has some experience of online sex work… 

Quiet at the back. Don’t make me flick the lights on and off.

…I am committed to respecting the origins of pole dancing as a practice that was created by strippers, and supporting all sex workers, who face significant inequalities within the UK (and beyond).” 

As I said, all terribly high-minded. Political, even.

Should any doubt remain,

A spokesman from the University of Lancaster said: “As a leading research-intensive university, we stand by the value of the contribution of arts and humanities to society.”

And as we’ve seen, many times, the Clown Quarter is driven purely by academic enquiry, a ceaseless thirst for knowledge.

Update:

In the comments, Twin Cities Teegan asks, not unreasonably,

Was there a hypothesis to test? Don’t research papers typically have a direction or theory that they are testing? That the information being gathered presumably will be used to create datasets which will then in turn be used to make conclusions about… something?

Alas, such details, should they exist, are now hidden from view. We are, however, assured,

The project recognises the labour often involved in creating / engaging with pole content and is therefore designed to provide accessible ways for pole dancers to participate that require minimal amounts of time and additional uncompensated labour from participants.

At risk of being presumptuous, it occurs to me that this theme of minimised intellectual labour may apply more generally. A suspicion not shaken by our scholar’s claims of “challenging patriarchal systems” by sharing nude photos on Instagram. Or by her public ruminations on such topics as “The Gendered Politics of Body Hair,” a feat of rote regurgitation and colossal self-involvement, in which we learn of the crushing oppressions of leg-waxing and eyebrow maintenance.

Readers who wish to probe further into the bush can find our scholar’s inexpert twerking here.




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