For newcomers and the nostalgic, more items from the archives:

Please Update Your Files And Lifestyles Accordingly.

Natan Last is a “fitful poet,” a Brooklynite, and a graduate of Columbia. Also, he will save us. 

The world of woke crossword-puzzlers – because that’s a thing that exists – is one in which enthusiasts, via social media, grumble about white men, bemoan the insufficient prominence of “queer or POC colloquialisms,” share “off-colour jokes about hypothetical titles for a Melania Trump memoir,” and fret about the exact ratio of male and female names used as clues. Because a lack of “gender parity” in crossword puzzle clues constitutes one of “the systemic forces that threaten women.” Crossword puzzles can do that, apparently.

She Feels Unclean. 

A woe is invented. A solution is discovered.

Gratuitous drama and “drenching guilt” aside, I’m not entirely sure why hiring a cleaner should obviously be more fraught than hiring, say, a gardener or roofer… But for the kind of middle-class feminist who as recreation writes for the Observer, life is apparently an endless moral torture inflicted by minor, everyday events, or at least an exhausting theatre of pretending to be tortured by minor, everyday events. Which of the two constitutes a more harrowing and nightmarish existence, I leave to the reader. 

And somewhat related,

Telepathy Not A Thing, Women Hardest Hit. 

Feminist titan Gemma Hartley bemoans the chore of getting her multiple bathrooms cleaned by someone else.

Or, Gratitude, Baby.

Like, you have to come out to me as cis and straight.

It turns out that if you, a straight person – or worse, a straight couple – attend a Pride event, your presence may only be tolerated if you meet certain terms and conditions. Please update your files and lifestyles accordingly.

Also, open thread. Have at it, me hearties.

And over at the University of Alberta:  

As an academic drag queen, Tommy is uniquely embodied in their scholarship and praxis of teaching and learning and has authored numerous peer-reviewed publications, including their forthcoming co-edited collection of essays on RuPaul’s Drag Race as it relates to teaching and learning. 

Tommy, we’re told, has a “decolonial, anti-racist, and equity-driven intersectional vision,” which is just the ticket, apparently. For an Executive Director of a Centre for Teaching and Learning. At a university with serious budget problems and supposedly gripped by austerity. Our cross-dressing educator will nonetheless bring to bear “strategies and resources for positive engagement with gender pronouns,” while prompting the less enlightened to “reflect on whiteness, marginalisation, trauma, and continued struggle.” Against reality, one assumes.

Also, open thread. Share ye links and bicker.

Someone not quite making the case she thinks she’s making. 

Open thread. Do chat among yourselves.

I’m not hungover. You’re hungover.

Or, Prattle Beyond The Stars: 

Physicists at MIT and SUNY Stony Brook recently announced findings that the total surface area of two black holes was maintained after the two entities merged. While this research was a welcome confirmation of both Stephen Hawking’s work and the theory of general relativity, it failed to address a crucial matter: what were its racial implications?

Heather Mac Donald browses an astronomy course at Cornell University, titled Black Holes: Race and the Cosmos, and premised on the question, “Is there a connection between the cosmos and the idea of racial blackness?” It seems unlikely that said course will enable any great scientific revelations, despite marshalling the combined forces of “Black Studies theorists” and the late jazz musician Sun Ra, who claimed to have visited Saturn; though it promises to “conjure blackness through cosmological themes.” 

And so, while some observe the merging of bogglingly massive astronomical objects, others regard themselves as a more fascinating topic, and “conjure” their own “blackness.” Via farce, contrivance, and racial narcissism.

Consider this an open thread. Share ye links and bicker.