Friday Ephemera (745)
Today’s word is proximity. || How to make the day exciting. || The wallet wins, I think. || House fire, interior view. || The thrill of saving up for one. || And every submarine should have one. || “Did you hear the music playing?” || Mushroom colour atlas. || Screw the kids, she gets to feel smug. || Question asked, promptly answered. || You want one and you know it. || “And they do bras as well.” || When everything is a latrine. (h/t, pst314) || Eternal TV, for niche streaming enthusiasts. (h/t, Things) || Misleading meme. || Answers on a postcard, please. || With four mallets. (h/t, Elephants Gerald) || Made of hemp and horse excrement. || How to deflate a cow. || For scale. || A UFO timeline. || For the fuller figure. || And finally, with effort, a journey to remember: “Do you need to take your pants down?”
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|| You want one and you know it. ||
Why yes, yes I do.
Although the size put me in mind of Daleks rather than military equipment, so I’d probably change the paint job, add a couple extremities, pop a steel colander on my head and go around shouting EX-TER-MIN-ATE! were I to acquire one.
The fish. I wanted to see what the fish did.
That looks like a training video to me. IIRC, actual house fires produce so much smoke that there’s almost zero visibility. The flames looked clean, like gas jets that they use in the movies.
It’s a two-part invention, so two for each part. Good luck with the 3- and 4-parters.
That seems like a really odd place to punch a hole. On Dr. Pol’s show, it’s usually in the belly.
As for that last one, they’re just going to have to buy a new seat, aren’t they? That’s not going to just wash out.
And every submarine should have one.
Piano, big deal, they all should have saunas, swimming pools, aquariums, and aviaries.
What? You don’t favour the teapot?
Only if the cannon works.
How to deflate a cow.
Assume a spherical cow
The Guardian?
They’re going to discover they didn’t save nearly enough in construction costs with that wall mount.
Bad for this blog’s content propositions; good for humanity.
Autopsy.
More post-election meltdown.
Video of the incident.
Do you suspect what I suspect?
“…is a latrine.“
‘The diverse area of Stratford’. That’s quite the euphemism!
Why does she look upwards? Does she think bears fly?
Morning, all.
Given my understanding of womanly secretions, I suspect the car’s a write-off.
Heh. Icing on the cake, no?
[ Slurps coffee. ]
We’ll always remember her.
Me: “At least things can’t get any worse”
Things: https://x.com/nftbadger/status/1857050020547039578
It does sit quite well with the Question asked, promptly answered link, in which Kittenfish (“far left,” pronouns she/her) asks, seemingly in earnest, in what ways wokeness is “actually” bad.
Heh. I did not see that coming.
Neither did she.
[ Checks supply of rock salt for prophesied snowfall. ]
[ Slurps coffee, considers toasted muffin. ]
That put me in a good mood. Thank you.
It’s not all doom and gloom here, you know.
“We can pick a game?”
[ Waits for Aitch to find last item in this week’s batch. ]
Ha ha. Thank you.
Reminder of note:
Note the indignant replies, claiming, bizarrely, that “all dissenting opinion is suppressed,” and that the original poster must be some incorrigible kitten-tormenting right-winger, despite him actually being a Democrat who voted for Harris.
Has a certain… symbolic quality.
And a calm husband. Well done all round.
Yes, rather gratifying. Messy and disgusting, too. But mostly gratifying.
“I don’t know if I can do it.”
And yet.
I should add, I’m not expecting the content of Scientific American to improve significantly, despite Ms Helmuth’s belated departure. I mean, once a cultural institution has been corrupted and degraded by wokeness – skin-suited, as they say – does it ever fully recover? Offhand, can’t think of an example.
“Do you need to take your pants down?”
Do you think perhaps you need to STOP THE BLOODY CAR? Then dial 911 and assist your wife?
When he started fiddling with her seatbelt and pants while still driving . . .
But glad everything worked itself out. Literally.
Meh, the whipped cream hides it.
Probably best not to do it while you’re driving.
Wait, what?
Maybe she’s a tourist from Australia.
Relatively. And it’s still excrement.
What’s with all these “progressive thinkers” and excrement?
Caution: No smoking.
How to make the day exciting.
This would be much more satisfying if he had been thrown through the windshield and run over by his own RV.
Not sorry. Stupid fucks like this are absolute menaces on the road.
“Things you won’t catch me doing in pre-op; washing my hands.
And I’m a surgeon.”
What does she think she’s supposed to be doing?
Crime of note.
Well, quite. And it takes a certain hubris to boast on social media – where parents of the children in question can see – that you don’t do basic aspects of your publicly funded job. Presumably, because doing those basic things might reveal something untoward about the distribution of cognitive wherewithal.
At which point, one might repeat Ms Kittenfish’s blissfully oblivious question:
Not blissful for others, I grant you.
“The abstruse theological reasoning is comprehensible only to insiders and nomenklatura.”
That’s the worst snow-shovelling I’ve ever seen.
The Day The Earth Stood Still.
“You must say these words: Klaatu barada nikto.”
“…Marxists’ real aim was a ‘pedantocracy’…a regime in which…a political intelligentsia, unemployable in normal circumstances, took positions of power…a large overproduction of people educated to be lawyers and administrators.”
Closely related: “truth is a distraction”
Never mind the criminal: What punishments should the DA’s and judges face?
Nommy nom nom. Except for the excess frosting.
This reminded me of an old Bloom County strip in which Binkley announced his crush on a new girl in class.