The Kind Of Creature You’ve Chosen To Be
Apparently, it’s outdated and oppressive for a young woman to be walked down the aisle at her wedding by her father. And so she can insult him and embarrass him by taking away that role. But of course it’s not outdated or oppressive for that same father to be expected to pay all of the bills for the wedding at which he’s being so pointedly sidelined and insulted:
Millennial girl wants dad to pay for wedding, but refuses to walk down the aisle with him.
Also mad her dad talked to friends to solicit opinions.
Dad’s not paying, girl now realizes she can’t afford it- now soliciting opinions from tik-tok.
My kids are going to trade school. pic.twitter.com/OC6Q7FRKhF— Jason “Storm Chaser” Nelson (@RealJasonNelson) January 14, 2024
She’s “an independent thinker,” you see.
Update, via the comments:
It’s not, I think, hard to see how being very publicly dispensed with as outmoded or embarrassing – as a symbol of oppression and wickedness – might hurt the feelings of a father you supposedly care about.
And yet the above.
Little Madam concedes – albeit as somehow “unrelated” – that her parents do not, in fact, treat her as “property” – a term she uses repeatedly – and have seemingly never done so. Yet this imagined connotation must nonetheless, in her mind, be avoided at all costs. Lest The Patriarchy be empowered. As if it would otherwise occur to everyone else present and shape how they see the wedding. Which strikes me as a little odd.
Over the years I’ve been to several weddings and at no point during any of them did I regard the proud father as someone handing over his property. As if he were reluctantly, under duress, giving away his car. That’s not an idea that popped into my head – or, so far as I can tell, the heads of anyone else present at the ceremonies.
Something precious, yes. But not property.
And so, in order to ostentatiously reject a construal that no-one at her wedding is likely to arrive at anyway, Little Madam has alienated her parents and needlessly jeopardised the wedding in question. That happy day. And now she wants strangers on the internet to back her up and pin the blame on someone else.
Also, filming yourself putting on make-up while being a vain, monstrous bitch is probably not a look to go for.
Also, open thread.
That.
I can tell you who definitely can’t afford this wedding – the groom.
Pity the groom.
It’s the fact that she’s doing this while fishing for affirmation. From strangers.
I mean, as a man who married another man, and who did so in a fairly unfussy way, it’s not my most obvious wheelhouse. But even I seem to have more appreciation for the traditions, the symbolism, and the meanings for other participants. It’s not, I think, hard to see how being very publicly dispensed with as outmoded might hurt the feelings of a father you supposedly care about.
And yet.
“What I’m finding out is: if you let your parent pay for your wedding you kind of have to do it their way.”
No shit Sherlock. That Economics degree finally paying off?
Or, more accurately, “you have to not antagonize them“.
Most fathers, thrilled that their daughter is getting married, are pretty accommodating to even very goofy wedding ceremony ideas. But they tend to react badly to being kicked in the teeth. In this case, I strongly suspect that this is far from the first time that his daughter has “disappointed” him.
Note too that Little Madam says that she suspects her father may have spoken with his “buddies” about the matter – an act she disdains – while herself soliciting opinions from random strangers on the internet.
Slap! That smug, entitled piece of impertinence needs another one. Slap!
As someone who has stopped photographing weddings, if you really want to do away with traditions that have survived past their expiration date – please, do your bouquet toss but ONLY have adult women vying for the prize. The number of times I have seen a 10-year-old cousin of the vride catch it and given the meaning behind it (she is the next to be wedded and bedded) . . . ew.
In regards to my comment last week about not trusting the recently woke-from-being-woke, it seems, just as I suspected, our hero Ackman cannot help himself. Stunning how obtuse these smart people can be. The river in Egypt is strong in this one.
Senate Estimates often throw up some surprises. None however, when the whole room is filled with wimminses and one male. Another common feature of those assemblies is the amount fat lumbered into the sitting room.
Madam concedes – albeit as somehow “unrelated” – that her parents do not, in fact, treat her as “property” – a term she uses repeatedly – and have seemingly never done so. Yet this imagined connotation must nonetheless, in her mind, be avoided at all costs. As if it would otherwise occur to everyone else present and shape how they see the wedding.
Which strikes me as a little odd.
Over the years I’ve been to several weddings and at no point during any of them did I regard the proud father as someone handing over his property. As if he were reluctantly, under duress, giving away his car. That’s not an idea that was in my head – or, so far as I can tell, in the heads of anyone else present at the ceremonies.
Something precious, yes. But not property.
NJH,
Your comment is in the wrong thread.
Who died and made you the comment monitor?
Oh, wait…
All part of the service, keeping the place tidy.
Lift your feet.
[ Hoovers underneath. ]
The shame.
I KNOW, RIGHT?
Who the hell does?
“I’m an independent thinker, with all the right thoughts”.
Pity the groom.
No, show him this video so he can get the hell out of Dodge.
Her at the gym.
Well, quite. And so, in order to ostentatiously reject a construal that no-one at her wedding is likely to arrive at anyway, she’s alienated her parents and needlessly jeopardised the wedding in question. That happy day. And now she wants strangers on the internet to back her up and blame someone else.
[ Post updated. ]
Radical feminists. I used to encounter that delusional belief fairly often back in the 70’s and 80’s when I still had frequent personal contact with such people.
Feminists and Marxists have a lot to answer for.
And so we return to the unwisdom of allowing leftists and other malevolent creatures to educate our children.
“Women need men like a fish needs a bicycle.”
–old feminist slogan
Except when it’s time for men to fund the welfare state.
I knew a number of feminists who, I hear, now depend heavily on welfare programs thanks in large part to their own unwise choices.
And fight fires. And arrest criminals. And maintain the electric grid. And drive trucks and crew freighters. And do the fishing, ranching, farming, etc that puts food on the table. And so on.
Is it too late for Daddy to cancel the checks he wrote for the venue, the officiant, the photographer, the DJ…? (That would make it one of those ‘Am I the A$$hole?’ stories found on Reddit.)
The symbolism is actually that the father is turning over responsibility for the woman to her new husband. Young women still, in spite of being so liberated, depend on their dads a lot. Dads buy the sweet thing a car for college (if able to) whereas he does not buy one for the sons. Young ladies are much more likely to get financial support from dad, even if employed. After the wedding, it is assumed that this will be discontinued. She is showing dimness and ingratitude.
She also seems to imagine she’s getting married in Yemen.
Although that does vary among families and subcultures and income levels. For instance, my sister and I got essentially equal financial support through college. No cars until we bought our own.
She is showing dimness and ingratitude.
True, but as the twig was bent, so grew the tree.
But we don’t really know who bent that twig: Kids are strongly influenced by their school teachers and college professors. And peers. The good kid who goes off to college and returns a Marxist or dope head or sexually confused has become a cliche.
My sister turned into a Marxist in spite of our parents, not because of them. Or at least mostly: Mom was a Unitarian and a liberal although never a supporter of commies. I think it was college and certain peer groups that bent her life path towards pernicious ideologies.
The good kid who goes off to college and returns a Marxist or dope head or sexually confused has become a cliche.
For every allegedly “good” kid who comes back a turnip, there are more who don’t because of proper parenting.(Offer not valid east of I-95 or west of I-5) My money is on the bint having been catered to, never refused anything, or heard the parent’s secret word, “No”.
Could be. But also remember the “bad seed” phenomenon: Kids are born with distinct personalities, and some are flawed in ways that are difficult to impossible to fix.
This particular woman’s behavior seems toxic in ways that suggest a flawed personality regardless of educational indoctrination, but there seem to be quite a few kids without such personality flaws who get indoctrinated into pernicious ideologies which are superficially appealing to the naive mind.
There is also the problem of parents who do not coddle and spoil their children but do fail to do a good job of explicitly educating them against the toxic ideologies that are out there.
I couldn’t sit through the whole thing. Forgive me. Honestly I did try but I could hear the wife doing that shifting in her chair signal thing. Does this over privileged AWFL actually have an economics degree? You know, a legitimate one, a Bachelor of Arts, like AOC has? You know, from a legitimate university like Boston University? Heh, ‘Bachelor’. I still find that amusing.
Well, what you stupid white peoples need to understand is how you are mentally ill. Well, technically on drugs. Well, not technically but technically. Ask the smart people. They will tell you what you need to know and what to think. If you want to work with other smart people anyway. And you do want to be smart, don’t you? Because the only other option is to be dumb. Obliviously.
Pity the groom.
Yup. In addition to that sparkling personality, she’s twenty something and she’s using foundation/concealer to cover her entire face. I’m betting she doesn’t age well.
Run Forest Run.
Yeah I didn’t listen to all her whinging either. I was just being sarcastic. I doubt she has a degree. Well, actually, these days – who knows, she might be the new President of Harvard for all I could tell.
Ha – who am I kidding. She’s white!
My latest attempt to start a British food flame war.
“Devon Meat Envelope”.
DEVON??
That there’s a CORNISH pasty you geographically challenged hick!
My husband and I paid for our wedding (2nd for both) and I still had my (late) dad walk me down the aisle. Because I love and honor him and being the escort to the next chapter in my life was important. (23 years this July)
Not to forget either my mom or my soon-to-be-in-laws, they were both asked “Who presents this [woman/man] to be married today?” and both couples said “we do”.
“Independent thinker” isn’t a synonym for “narcissist”.
“Independent thinker” isn’t a synonym for “narcissist”.
However, it can be for NPC.
For the ignorami in the audience, or Americans, but I repeat myself, Devon pasties have a fat shape and a top crimp like a dropped purse, whereas Cornish pasties are flattened half-moons with a side crimp. Like a purse your momma sat on.
They both have crusts made from plaster patching compound and are filled with cheap under-cooked vegetables in a thin meat slime. Even if they claim to be steak.
Supposedly local hobbit inhabitants would take them down the tin mines holding them by their inedible crusts – which would end up covered in arsenic-laden slag and discarded. History does not record what they did with the contents. Greased their ponies with them, probably.
“vote for me and … I’ll bring back those jobs, I’ll make your life better.” And the crackpot thinks that is a PROBLEM? What, we are supposed to vote for the candidate who is out to ‘fundamentally change’ America into not-America?
Sshh. You’re giving away the secret.
OMG these people are just literal bags of racism aren’t they? The racism oozes, leaks and squirts out of them every time they move or open their mouths. They just can’t help it.
I suppose it’s a handy marker for the rest of us though. Cunningly, not all of them have conveniently coloured their hair.
And this is why American-made Cornish pasties are not authentic: Real meat.
Not to be confused with the item of “clothing” found in strip clubs.
It wouldn’t have been invented now, it’s obviously a vestige of a society where there were distinct male roles (including, God forbid, fathers and husbands in the role of authority figures) with distinct male honor attached to the fulfillment of those roles. Male authority and honor have been discredited as abuse/toxic masculinity, and unimaginable to defend on principle as something that’s might be to the good of men/women/children/society, so you end up with appeals to nostalgia or sentiment that are easily knocked aside by high school essay writers, never mind strong independent women with BA’s. If it just symbolizes the forging of generational links, why can’t the mother walk the groom down the aisle? If your father has been looking forward to it, and it would be a nice way of thanking him for all those mornings driving you to gymnastics practice, why is his fragile male ego being pandered to, and why isn’t the mother equally thanked?
I will reserve some sympathy for the girl who doesn’t realize how much she’s fucqing up her life with her selfish attitude. At this pace, she’s bound to dump her husband (or be dumped by her) after she’s given birth to a couple of kids. Then, by the time she’s 40, she’ll be profiled on Dating Delusions because she thinks she can land a Chad with money to take her traveling and be a father to her kids.
David:
In the preindustrial era, fathers were relieved to be unloading an uneconomical woman-child who could not pull her weight.
With a crop of postmodern daughters like these, there may be a bit of that relief creeping back in to fathers’ broad smiles…
You’re forgetting the dowry the fathers had to come up with.
Full disclosure: I did once have a Cornish pasty while vacationing in England. It was tasty and contained real meat and vegetables. In fact, every meal I had there was fine.
“American-made Cornish pasties are not authentic: Real meat.”
You mean like Buc-ees?
I know nothing about Buc-ees.
The ones I had were from small restaurants in the Midwest.
I know nothing about Buc-ees.
Yet another poor benighted nekultury, stuck in an uncivilized Buc-ee’s desert.
Food deserts are real! Wake up sheeple!
This sounds tempting, in spite of the, er, unfortunate name.
“I know nothing about Buc-ees”
The sympathy…
I’m sorry, but this tweet posted under the British food one is hilarious: https://twitter.com/uuganaa_v2/status/1746726463515005284
Quite.
We needed to tank up the car yesterday so we drove 17 miles/25 minutes to Buc-ee’s and had bbq brisket sandwiches for lunch. Well, we really didn’t need to tank up the car.
One quibble was that some genius up here in Jacksonville thought putting Buc-ee’s at the same exit and across the street from Costco was a good idea. Had to sit through two light changes and considerable traffic. This out in BFE Duval county. Would do it again in a heartbeat..
She seems to love the tradition of daddy paying for the wedding. Isn’t that giving in to patriarchal norms?
Feminists have long demanded that men pay for stuff, although usually via government giveaways.