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Academia Free-For-All

Between The Thighs

July 1, 2024 136 Comments

Speaking, as we were, of Clown Quarter academics and their relentless intellectual thrusting, I bring you this:

A PhD researcher is “investigating pole dancers’ digital media practices,” with funding from the taxpayer, the Telegraph can reveal. 

“Digital media practices” sounds so much more scholarly than, say, tarts who use OnlyFans. Oh, and Instagram. Naturally, this is being done “through an intersectional feminist framework.” One that “centres lived experience.” So lofty stuff, and rigorous to boot.

The researcher behind this colossal undertaking informs us,

“As someone who frequently practices pole dancing for recreational purposes and also has some experience of online sex work… 

Quiet at the back. Don’t make me flick the lights on and off.

…I am committed to respecting the origins of pole dancing as a practice that was created by strippers, and supporting all sex workers, who face significant inequalities within the UK (and beyond).” 

As I said, all terribly high-minded. Political, even.

Should any doubt remain,

A spokesman from the University of Lancaster said: “As a leading research-intensive university, we stand by the value of the contribution of arts and humanities to society.”

And as we’ve seen, many times, the Clown Quarter is driven purely by academic enquiry, a ceaseless thirst for knowledge.

Update:

In the comments, Twin Cities Teegan asks, not unreasonably,

Was there a hypothesis to test? Don’t research papers typically have a direction or theory that they are testing? That the information being gathered presumably will be used to create datasets which will then in turn be used to make conclusions about… something?

Alas, such details, should they exist, are now hidden from view. We are, however, assured,

The project recognises the labour often involved in creating / engaging with pole content and is therefore designed to provide accessible ways for pole dancers to participate that require minimal amounts of time and additional uncompensated labour from participants.

At risk of being presumptuous, it occurs to me that this theme of minimised intellectual labour may apply more generally. A suspicion not shaken by our scholar’s claims of “challenging patriarchal systems” by sharing nude photos on Instagram. Or by her public ruminations on such topics as “The Gendered Politics of Body Hair,” a feat of rote regurgitation and colossal self-involvement, in which we learn of the crushing oppressions of leg-waxing and eyebrow maintenance.

Readers who wish to probe further into the bush can find our scholar’s inexpert twerking here.

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Written by: David
Ephemera

Friday Ephemera (727)

June 28, 2024 173 Comments

She must’ve been able to see the beginning of space and time. || The smooth jazz noodling is the icing on the cake. || Incoming. || Suboptimal situation. || New “fatphobic” thing detected. || I believe the preferred term is selling ass. || The thrill of German syntax. || Good news, bad news. || Hiding underground. || A lot can happen in 28 seconds. || She hopes this clarifies things. || Demon cat. || Mr Achacoso is a psychiatric nurse. || Walk towards the light. || Those rope-burn woes. || “The woman is just one of 140 people being investigated for making ‘harmful comments’ towards the rapists.” || Armpit charms. || On the pitfalls of pitch correction software. || Policing at its finest. || Some punching required. || Chesterton’s cone. || And finally, well, um, I’m just going to leave this here.

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Academia Free-For-All Music

Don’t Oppress My People With Your White-Ass Folk Music

June 24, 2024 232 Comments

In crushed-by-niche-culture news:

University of Sheffield researchers handed taxpayer cash to ‘decolonise’ folk singing.

A mere £1,485,400, since you ask. A gnat’s eyelash. For an issue of such fundamental importance to the turning of the world.

The project… has also been granted extra funds on top of this from bodies such as Research England. 

Whew. I was getting worried there.

Taking place at the University of Sheffield, researchers “will take an unflinching look at the white-centricity of folk music repertory, performers and audience by conducting fieldwork to shed light on long-standing vernacular singing practices of ethnic minority cultures in England.”

Obviously, activities that are chiefly indulged in by white people – in this case, folk singing – must be deemed suspect and found problematic with great urgency, and then probed for hidden wrongness. At taxpayer expense.

And all this scholarly rigour ain’t cheap:

Researchers describe one of their methods as, “ask a friend,” which “involves community researchers interviewing acquaintances.” 

And – and – a word-association game.

Interviewees were asked about their culture and arts background, their attitudes and experiences of folk singing. To give us a sense of the interviewees’ understanding of key concepts, they also took part in a word association game using seven terms common in the folk scene: ‘folk music’, ‘traditional music’, ‘folk songs’, ‘folk singing’, ‘folk singer’, ‘folk club’ and ‘folklore’. 

Those interviewed – and subjected to this no-doubt-gruelling test of word-association – included “36 women, 21 men, and 2 non-binary people.” The researchers thereby deduced that “male associations are more prevalent than female ones.” By which they mean, members of their tiny, rather incestuous sample were slightly more likely to mention Bob Dylan than Joan Baez. And to mention “beards” slightly more often than “long dresses with red trim.”

Also, the word guitar was mentioned more often than tin whistles.

It’s Earth-rumbling stuff. Heaving with import.

However, given the puny sample size, the researchers concede that “it is hard to draw conclusions” from their academic toil.

Presumably, this limitation will be more than compensated for with further “systemic reflections” on “various notions of Englishness.” By Higher Beings who wish to “decolonise” folk music, on account of its “white-centricity,” and whose motives and impartiality will therefore be utterly beyond reproach.

Update, via the comments:

Fay Hield, professor of music at the University of Sheffield, said: “The term decolonisation is often misinterpreted.”

Oh, I think it’s understood quite well, thank you. Along with the kinds of people to whom such things most typically appeal.

“Our research highlights the different under-recognised communities who have helped to establish cultural life in England. Folk music is a constantly evolving genre, which has taken influences from a diverse range of people over centuries. It is part of the UK’s cultural heritage and should be celebrated.” 

Except for the “white-centric” bit, obviously.

That will have to go.

And behind this mannered waffle is the weird implication that devotees of folk music are somehow, simply by existing, excluding racial minorities. Shooing them away. Though, again, details on this point are neither obvious nor forthcoming. Still, perhaps we can look forward to an academic interrogation of classic car shows in Nottinghamshire as some heinous bastion of “white-centricity.” Another item on the list of Things That Must Be Decolonised And Morally Corrected.

“Our aim is to break down the barriers for people to get involved in folk music. Opening up the genre to different audiences will help to sustain the nation’s folk music for decades to come.” 

Different audiences. Not the audience it actually has, mind, the one it attracts, and which is arrived at via choice and musical inclination. No actual barriers to participation are specified, of course. But the audience is nonetheless all wrong, apparently.

Update 2:

Following the quip about British classic car shows as another potential target for pointless academics, commenters svh and asiaseen caution against giving such people ideas:

Not just “white-centricity”, but judging by the photograph, “white-male-centricity.” 

That’s this photograph here. Do feel free to grip the arms of your chair.

Having covered quite a few of these “decolonisation” efforts, which generally rely on a fig-leaf of widening access and removing barriers, it’s remarkable just how rarely any meaningful obstacle to access is actually mentioned. Typically, the humdrum is depicted as gruelling and somehow agonising, and motes are inflated to the size of boulders.

We were told, for instance, that racial minorities are being “deterred” from visiting the British countryside “due to deep-rooted, complex barriers.” Barriers such as the fact that rock-climbing instructors are usually white. And apparently this unremarkable state of affairs, in a white-majority country, is something that needs fixing.

Though it occurs to me that if a person with brown skin were being deterred from trying rock climbing by the fact that the instructor is likely to be white, then it seems somewhat unlikely that said person is interested in rock climbing to any significant extent. And a person deterred by such things may also want to reflect on their own racial assumptions. But we’re not supposed to mention those, at least not in an unflattering light.

The monstrous yet invisible forces preventing racial minorities from walking down country lanes also include “a lack of culturally appropriate provisions,” though, again, details as to what these culturally appropriate provisions might be, or indeed why they should be provided, seemingly at public expense, remain something of a mystery. Perhaps we should throw a few more millions at clown-shoe academics.

As I said in reply,

If I were to move to, say, South Korea and complained in a national Korean newspaper about how I was being deterred from visiting Seoraksan National Park or Namiseom Island, on account of such places… not already having sufficient numbers of white Europeans striding about in a suitably affirming manner, you might think me a tad presumptuous.

And likewise, were I to complain about being prevented from participating in some Korean cultural activity due to the number of Korean people I’d have to encounter while doing it, you might think me dubious in other ways. You might even wonder why I’d moved there in the first place.

Consider this an open thread. Share ye links and bicker.

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Written by: David
Ephemera

Friday Ephemera (726)

June 21, 2024 201 Comments

So how was your day at work, dear? || Some difficulty with heels. || Some difficulty with language. || “Decolonisation” dilemma: “A University of Oxford museum will not display an African mask because the culture which created it forbids women from seeing it.” || How the Dutch will take over the world. || My, how you’ve grown. || Sound on for title sequence. || Customer service. || Hazard sign. || Incoming. || This is London, 1981. || Scenes of enrichment. || Tricky manoeuvre. || Compressed towels. || Solving the three-stroller problem. || Today’s word is parenting. || The progressive retail experience, parts 557, 558, 559, and 560. || Always roller your squirrel. || The wheezing motor noise is particularly erotic. || And finally, in a friendly way, your French teacher says hi.

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Reheated

Reheated (94)

June 19, 2024 93 Comments

For newcomers, some items from the archives. Further to this recent item, readers may detect a theme of sorts.

Don’t Oppress My People With The Way You Walk.

Whitey’s hegemonic walking must be disrupted. Along with everything else.

Having been mocked for his unargued assertions and casual racism, Mr Allen is now complaining that people, presumably white ones, “don’t want to engage” with his unargued assertions and casual racism. The truth of his claims is, he says, “obvious.” An attitude that would, I suppose, explain the lack of evidence or any reciprocal standard, and the apparent disregard for any expectation of such.

However, perhaps a few atoms of sympathy are in order. It occurs to me that if your immediate environment is one in which race-based claims aren’t subject to challenge or scepticism, even when sweeping and rather dubious, it must be quite unnerving to encounter these things for the first time. 

Don’t Oppress My People With Your Public Libraries.

Librarian Sofia Leung rails against the White Devil and his books.

Ms Leung airs her distaste for “white men ideas” – as if they had been uniform across continents and throughout history – while reminiscing about attending a “white AF conference” two years earlier. I was unsure what the “AF” might refer to and searched for some literary or scholarly explanation. It then occurred to me that a “white AF conference” is, to borrow the woke vernacular, a white as fuck conference. Which is how not-at-all-racist academic librarians convey their thoughts, apparently.

Readers may also wish to ponder the implications of a librarian and self-styled educator, schooled at the University of Washington and Barnard College, New York, and who is offended – something close to enraged – by the existence of “white ideas” and the “so-called ‘knowledge’” of “white dudes.” 

Don’t Oppress My People With Your Acceptance And Compliments.

The Guardian’s Natalie Morris juggles humblebragging with contrived downtroddenness.

We are informed, firmly, that, “It’s impossible to see the rise of mixed beauty ideals as a positive thing, because at its heart sits an unsettling insistence on white superiority.” It’s impossible, you see. Though how Ms Morris arrived at this assertion is less than clear. This being the Guardian, however, it does have an air of inevitability, of predestination.

Ms Morris tells us that in her youth not being white and not looking like the women seen most often in media and advertising made her feel “insecure.” And yet now, when women who resemble her, racially, are all but ubiquitous in media and advertising – way out of proportion to actual demographics, and even added anachronistically to historical dramas – this is also a cause of unhappiness and resentment, and an excuse for convoluted theories of racial victimhood.

Don’t Oppress My People With Your Big Hooped Earrings.

Not just earrings, mind. Lip-liner, too.

If you want to see evidence of maturity and self-possession, the Pitzer College Media Studies department, where Ms Alegria Martinez spends her time and some poor sucker’s money, probably isn’t the first place to look. And I think that, for many, that’s the tacit appeal of identitarian wokeness – it’s a chance to defer adult norms, and an excuse to act out pretentious, inchoate tantrums.

But it is a strange thing, this combination of assumed superiority and infantile emoting. Remember, Ms Martinez and Ms Aguilera emailed the entire campus, repeatedly and quite vehemently, with their views on hooped earrings and who should be allowed to wear them. It does, I think, take a particular chutzpah to publicly claim to be oppressed – by other people’s earrings – while spending more than the median household income at a glorified holiday resort. 

Don’t Oppress My People With Your Norms Of Punctuality.

Being expected to arrive for work on time is “systemic white supremacy.”

Says student Shahamat Uddin, “The reason ‘coloured people time’ exists is because non-Western cultures tend to have more polychronic work environments, and there is a different prioritisation of family and relationships over capitalist productivity and work demands.” Which is obviously what every employer wants to hear. And pay for. Every month.

A “polychronic” culture, since you ask, is one in which chatting and distractions are both commonplace and encouraged, and in which “issues such as promptness” – and reliability and productivity – are not prioritised. As favoured in, say, sub-Saharan Africa, that engine of civilisational blossoming and human betterment. 

Oh, and we mustn’t forget this one:

Don’t Oppress My People With Your White Devil Science.

On the hurling of lightning. And the smearing of human faeces.

In the video below, filmed at the University of Cape Town, members of the science faculty meet with student protestors who wish to “decolonise” the university – and not pay their bills. During the meeting, one of the staff, one of the “science people,” points out that, contrary to claims being made by a student protestor, witchcraft doesn’t in fact allow Africans to throw lightning at their enemies. He is promptly scolded for “disrespecting the sacredness of the space,” which is a “progressive space,” and is told either to apologise or leave. 

Other allegedly oppressive phenomena, including departmental acronyms and branded headphones, can be found in the archives.

Consider this an open thread. Share ye links and bicker.

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In which we marvel at the mental contortions of our self-imagined betters.