Boobs in a jam, an obliging nudge. || Rice grain Gojira. || I’m no expert, but I don’t think that’s a guitar. || Feel the deep wisdom of her third eye. || Driving with intuition. || How to shrink your lungs. || Laughing while pregnant. || Little helpers. || The progressive retail experience, parts 609, 610, 611, 612, and 613. || Beef pottage and other thrills of the Medieval tavern. || You know, I question the physics. || Big and clicky, the way you like ’em. || On the problems of a billion-story building. || Tibetan sky burial. || Bottled for freshness. || Espionage essentials. || Question asked. || Taking out the trash. || More adventures in trash management. || His “first ever lesson” is to make small children memorise his own fabulist pronouns. || And finally, one to be filed under poolside etiquette.

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From the realm of the tightly-wound and twitchy, how to eat out while being a needy, neurotic, self-dramatising pinhead:

You can go into any restaurant and ask to be served by an ally or trans positive person.

And you can leave if the restaurant is playing Fox News. Most importantly, you can smugly eat chips while you make a video. pic.twitter.com/lq3lcmy5LS

— Dr. Jebra Faushay (@JebraFaushay) February 11, 2025

So far as I can make out, the rules are as follows.

First, you should expect the restaurant’s serving staff to be conveniently categorised by their sexual inclinations or some other “ally” attribute, as if that weren’t presumptuous and intrusive – and, you know, weird. And should a pleasingly downtrodden identity be available – and said person dragged into your luminous presence – then you can bestow upon them your glorious and not-at-all-self-serving affirmation.

Naturally, you should make sure everyone sees. And hey, who wouldn’t want to be wheeled out as a prop, an accessory, for someone else’s attention-seeking project?

Oh, and then – but of course – you video yourself talking, with a mouth full of food, about how morally superior you are, before uploading this proof of your own magnificence to social media. Where applause will surely follow.

Please update your files and lifestyles accordingly.

Also, open thread.

Or, Shakespeare For The Tremulous And Neurotic: 

No laughing at the back.

And this place is still here. 

Do help yourself to cake. For newcomers, here’s a pretty good introduction to what goes on here. If you like… that, well, there’s plenty more.

Oh, and open thread.

Toilet-related suspense. || The slightest of smiles. || Surprisingly upright. || Dinner and a show. || Abundant condiments. || Place your bets. || Cops and robbers. || A beginner’s guide to nuclear physics, explained with Fuzzy Felt. (h/t, Elephants Gerald) || A brief history of Super Glue. || I think this makes him King of the Dogs. || Big and flexible. || Social gaffe. || Heavyweight altercation with bonus faeces. || Lifestyle influencers. || Helping hand. || Hairy food. || Monastery. || Incoming. || Incoming 2. || More joys of public transport. || Answers on a postcard, please. || On apotemnophilia, a parable for our times. || Just the one portion, thanks. || Man makes poor decision. || Chopstick stuck. || Snake watch. || A situation had arisen. || And finally, niche kink meets product demonstration.

To be notified of new posts, you can follow me on X / Twitter.

To enable extra commenting options – including @username mentions, upvotes, and live notifications – scroll down to the black ‘Meta’ box at the very bottom of the page and click register. It’s free and quite painless.