Trump, Erections, And A Lack Thereof
Salon interrupts its usual programming – repeatedly announcing how terrible white people are – to bring us this:
Trump’s assault on the country’s mental health is part of a much larger pattern: the Republican Party and the conservative movement have, for decades, advanced an agenda which has hurt the overall health and well-being of most Americans.
I suspect the “most Americans” bit is doing some heavy lifting there. As we saw recently, those whose minds come undone at the mere thought of Mr Trump – resulting in alcoholism, divorces, the stalking of ex-boyfriends, and sessions with psychiatrists – tend to belong to a fairly specific demographic. One that, oddly enough, includes readers of Salon.
Donald Trump’s negative impact on mental health extends to the intimate sexual lives of many people as well.
We’re told this by Mr Chauncey DeVega, Salon’s politics staff writer, who attempts to bolster his claims by wheeling out some niche expertise:
I recently spoke with Dr Susan Block. “Dr Suzy” is the founder and director of the Dr Susan Block Institute for the Erotic Arts & Sciences.
Okay, then.
Dr Suzy, our high priestess of the erotic arts and sciences, promptly informs us,
Dr Suzy’s pronouncements are varied and numerous, though her train of thought is, it has to be said, not the easiest to follow:
The news media is part of the problem as well. The news is full of stories about bad sex. They don’t really like to talk about good sex. When you have this media obsession with bad sex with the usual “all American” war worship and racism, as well as economic disparities and the way that corporations are in control, it really sucks the life out of a person.
Apparently, the news media and unspecified corporations are behind it all. Stealing our sexual essence, I mean.
We also cannot forget all of the “ammosexuals” who substitute their favourite guns for a working penis.
No, of course. We mustn’t forget those.
Yes, Donald Trump is a turn-off for many people.
While I can boast no credentials as a high priestess of the erotic arts and sciences, unlike Dr Susan Block, “founder and director of the Dr Susan Block Institute for the Erotic Arts & Sciences,” a layman’s thought occurs. If the existence of Donald Trump is interfering with your sex life, bringing it to a standstill, then perhaps you’re thinking about Mr Trump a little too much. More than one ought, at least while under the duvet and attempting to get busy.
However, as Dr Suzy explains, it’s not all bad news:
But for some people they are turned on and titillated by Donald Trump
Oh, there’s no backing out now. We’re just getting started, baby.
Both men and women really do find Trump to be an appealing “bad boy” and “evil daddy” who’s really hot.
An evil daddy.
And of course, evil can be very sexy. Evil is fascinating.
This, um, tangent continues for several paragraphs. Apparently, Dr Suzy is in her wheelhouse, her realm of arcane knowledge:
Donald Trump embodies the symbolic cultural role as the “Big Mean Sexy Daddy.”
Such is the febrile erotic atmosphere, Mr DeVega gets excited too:
Donald Trump leads a political cult whose members want to literally be inside of him, to become him, to have a libidinal relationship with the Great Leader. This includes both men and women. The fascist aesthetic can be very erotic for the followers.
Now beaded with sweat and not to be outdone, Dr Suzy replies:
Trump’s supporters want to be spanked by him.
If anyone’s touching themselves right now, I’m going to flick the lights on and off.
Anyway, this goes on for some time, the general thrust being that Trump voters are both repressed and depraved, have sexual fantasies about their daughters, are inclined to spanking fetishes, and are “frightened and made angry by strong… confident women.” Needless to say, how these insights were arrived at isn’t entirely clear. Apparently, bald assertion will have to do.
We’re also told, emphatically,
Conservative men are very turned on by the thought of seeing their wives or girlfriends with other men… It scares them but it also makes their penises hard.
This latter claim may also strike readers as something of a reach, given that the recent spate of articles championing cuckoldry have been written, not by conservatives, but by ladies and gentleman of a woke and progressive persuasion, and published, triumphantly, in the left-leaning media, including CNN and the famously Trump-supporting New York Times. As one self-declared cuckold put it during an interview with Vice, “Most people in the scene tend to be [politically] left.” But hey, let’s not inhibit the tumescent fantasy.
There is, of course, more, some of it quite lurid. But this is, I maintain, a respectable establishment.
Towels are available behind the bar.
Looks like it is all good news. Snowflakes not having sex, most of them are not male or female and won’t reproduce. If we just stopped them stealing our offspring and indoctrinating them they would be wiped out in a couple of generations.
Donald Trump leads a political cult whose members want to literally be inside of him,
Now laughing on a train. People are looking. 😀
People are looking.
No refunds. Credit note only.
Gonna need more towels.
Conservative men are very turned on by the thought of seeing their wives or girlfriends with other men…
The origin of the term cuckservative, used to denote a certain class of “conservative”, in fact
“Lefties project”
Setting aside the neuroticism and flights of erotic fancy, including spanking and incest, there’s also the conceit that the purported woes of a subset of lefties – in this case, Trump-induced erectile dysfunction – are somehow representative of “most Americans” and the nation as a whole.
It’s both grandiose and parochial.
You will be surprised to learn that Miss Block’s professional qualifications include a
histrionicsdrama degree from Yale, a masters in psychology from an unaccredited school that was bought out by an online university, and a “doctorate” from the also unaccredited “Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality” which is apparently know for its collection of adult films in its library.Her learned output includes the “sex educational film series Dr. Suzy’s Squirt Salons”, “Anal Food Rape in the CIA“, and of course The Bonobo Way, so her insights are unimpeachable and she should be taken
as a complete loonas gospel.in this case, Trump-induced erectile dysfunction
Winning hugely.
Remember when General Jack D. Ripper in Doctor Strangelove was a parody?
The idea that a hyperventilating, over the top paranoid, who became hysterical at the thought of politicians selling them out, was such an exaggeration that even Kubrick was worried he might be too unbelievable.
He was simply a generation or two ahead of this time, that’s all.
The “doctor” has what I would call a mighty selective knowledge of bonobos. No, they aren’t quite as jihad, jihad as chimpanzees, but they are far from peaceful. Adult bonobo sisters, for example, have been observed ambushing and tearing apart the unattended young of non-relation females.
Didn’t Polly Toynbee once write something about Gordon Brown being some sort of viking sent to excitingly rescue us all?
I admit I have erotic fantasies about Katheryn Winnick as Lagertha in the TV show Vikings, but I draw the line at Mr Brown. He merely spanked the nation financially as PM, without any viking qualities as I recall.
I mean, really? Just how deranged is the US media. I know that Mr Trump is an orange braggart, but how the hell are we supposed to believe that sane people have stopped having sex because of that. Trump-induced erectile disfunction? Really? When I became an accredited Psychiatric Nurse back then in the 1980’s my Mum warned me that people who worked in those places became like that themselves. I can’t, in retrospect, say she was wrong. But I can say that most of the patients in mental hospitals are, seriously, a lot less crazy than the people who write this stuff.
Katheryn Winnick
OK, now I’m touching myself….
Anyway, this goes on for some time, the general thrust being that Trump voters are both repressed and depraved,….
I see what you did there.
This is my innocent face.
Someone better start flicking the lights on and off.
If you’ve quite finished.
how the hell are we supposed to believe that sane people have stopped having sex
I daresay the question contains its own answer. If an historically-illiterate and histrionic media and mainstream culture dedicate every waking moment to the creation and popularization of insanity, then it’s within the bounds of possibility that the phenomenon is widespread… without being sane qua sane.
We also cannot forget all of the “ammosexuals” who substitute their favourite guns for a working penis.
Putting aside the interesting feminist tendency to embrace the societal expectations of males when in order to mock their virility, I’m literally shaking right now from the literal violence she’s committed against my chosen gender-identity. Speaking as an ammosexual in [current year], it’s difficult enough living in a society that hates you, that wants to erase your existence every time there’s a school shooting, without hateful bigots like Susan Block caliber-shaming my lived experience.
Western culture indoctrinates people to value non-lethal sexualities in order to oppress the brave, fierce individuals who identify as a 1956 Yugoslavian Mauser. When someone calls their penis a “sword” it only perpetuates the meleenormative, Blade Supremacist culture that literally kills ammosexuals daily. So I wear my powder burns with pride as I stand with the LGBT.38+P community!
“The fascist aesthetic can be very erotic for the followers.”
So they say. But… what “aesthetic” are we talking about here, precisely? MAGA hats? They’re hardly black uniforms with silver braid and jackboots, are they?
Of course, to these people, every Republican presidential candidate is a herald of American Fascism. And frankly, the idea of Mitt Romney as the reincarnation of Hitler was as absurd as this dream I had about…
“Didn’t Polly Toynbee once write something about Gordon Brown being some sort of viking sent to excitingly rescue us all?”
Wait… you saw it too? That actually happened? Gordon Brown, the world’s dullest man (at least John Major had an interesting dad and a funny voice) as heroic viking warrior.
“By navigating at a heading of between 200 and 270 degrees for approximately, mmm, 2-400 miles, we intend to conduct a number of targetted operations involving, but not limited to, rape, pillage, and slaughter, in certain selected regions of the British Isles. This programme will be rolled out over the course of the next six months, and will involve a massive investment in the longboat industry as well as representing a vote of confidence in our armed forces.”
She’s completely hatstand, that woman.
“Now laughing on a train.”
I’ve decided this is the best approach to “progressive” idiocy. Don’t engage; they’ll just bog you down with pedantry about peripherals, try to reframe the discussion, and if all else fails insult you to your face. Just laugh. A simple snort of derision can be even more effective in the right situation, such as whenever anyone mentions their “carbon footprint”, “food miles”, or “saving the planet”.
[…] the general thrust […]
ISWYDT
If you’ve quite finished.
Actually, I googled Dr Suzy and the moment passed…
Speaking as an ammosexual in [current year], it’s difficult enough living in a society that hates you, that wants to erase your existence every time there’s a school shooting, without hateful bigots like Susan Block caliber-shaming my lived experience.
Full marks for that passage, Sam! David — the next time Sam leaves an italics tag open, it would be my pleasure to endure the pickled egg “reward” on his behalf.
the next time Sam leaves an italics tag open,
I’m going to leave this here.
Just in case.
It appears more likely that Trump has merely exposed the already existing mental health incapacity and disability of these loons. The sex angle is mere click bait. And displacement. And projection. And narcissism. The prog-left, again, exposes its lack of a self-awareness gene…
the next time Sam leaves an italics tag open
Ahem. The NEXT time? How very dare you, sir. My italicization is impeccable, so harrumph I say.
/nervously previews this comment 4 times
Sam (not Duncan),
So I wear my powder burns with pride as I stand with the LGBT.38+P community!
It appears more likely that Trump has merely exposed the already existing mental health incapacity and disability of these loons.
The blogger Neo-neocon used the term plaque discloser, in that some people can agitate the left sufficiently to make them reveal themselves. It needn’t be Trump, of course. Jordan Peterson does it too, regularly, as does Janice Fiamengo, Heather Mac Donald, and any number of others. By simply refusing to defer and pretend, even when refusing in the politest possible way, they provoke a kind of malevolent hysteria.
Sam (Duncan),
Gordon Brown, the world’s dullest man…
As a young dullard, did he ever show up at an employment agent’s claiming he wanted to be a lion tamer?
Leftoids are endlessly fascinated with sexual intercourse — probably because no one with a job actually wants to sleep with them.
Breaking slightly with protocol, and quoting my own post
Remember when General Jack D. Ripper in Doctor Strangelove was a parody?
I’m proud to see that I’m on the same wavelength as the inestimable Iowahawk
I mean, really? Just how deranged is the US media.
Quite so. Where there are indeed functional writers who write, and then there is also the utterly hysterical handwaving shrieking of the sort that David keeps spotting.
Such chaff is indeed why I resort to general skimming of the collective headlines to get a better and much more accurate idea of what is rather more likely to be occurring here and there . . .
…in order to oppress the brave, fierce individuals who identify as a 1956 Yugoslavian Mauser.
You think that is bad, see what happens to those poor bastards who identify as Mk.5 No.1 Lee-Enfields and have the full weight of the SJW community come crashing down accusing them of both blackface and cultural appropriation when they call themselves Jungle Carbines.
the next time Sam leaves an italics tag open
Ahem. The NEXT time? How very dare you, sir. My italicization is impeccable, so harrumph I say.
Also quite so. I was wondering where the spray had occurred and scanned for italicized attributions—-There aren’t any.
/nervously previews this comment 4 times
Actually, a much easier version is to hit enter a couple of times and add a test word, like, test. Then do hit the Preview button, that is what it’s there for . . . . .
—And, yes, do then remove the test bit before hitting the Post button, and keep hitting Preview.
Needless to say, how these insights were arrived at isn’t entirely clear. Apparently, bald assertion will have to do.
It’s bald assertion that doesn’t have to be supported because it has the weight behind it of half a century of popular culture assuring us that Deplorables are deplorable because they’re sexually repressed, impotent, in the closet, afraid of women, etc.
Maybe the intellectual roots of such assertions could be traced back to Freudians or Bloomsbury types arguing the necessity of Free Love to prevent another Great War. It might have taken some persuasion back then, but for us it’s just a repetition of Something Everybody Knows, an overall impression distilled from a lifetime watching things like Stepford Wives, Footloose, and Dead Poets’ Society.
I was talking to a friend about Peyton Place, saying how it was a forerunner of shows like Twin Peaks, their takeaway point being that historically white small towns might look idyllic and egalitarian, but behind their white picket fences lurks lust, hypocrisy, scandal, etc (cue the fashionable singer with their “subversive” darkly-toned low-energy reinterpretation of Mr Sandman). My friend blurted out, “yeah, that’s the way it is in those places”. He’s a city dweller with no experience of such towns and what goes on or doesn’t go on behind their white picket fences. I’m not sure if he’s even seen a picket fence. But he knows with mathematical certainty that the Deplorables are up to deplorable things in their deplorable towns.
One could, of course, post a comment wholly in italic, and then leave the unitalicized word “test” in on purpose, so as to bait Hal.
test
I was wondering where the spray had occurred and scanned for italicized attributions—-There aren’t any.
That shows how effectively our host and his minions work–in the background–to keep us all safe from careless, rampant italicization.
test
Heh!
That is amusing!
blackface and cultural appropriation when they call themselves Jungle Carbines
And don’t get me started on “sawed off” shotguns (as if there are only 2 barrel lengths – they’re on a spectrum, bigot!), the Ruger “Mini” 14 (ableist much?), M3 “Grease” Guns (designed to genocide Latinx folk, obvs), and the Taurus “Judge” (a gun that preemptively hands out a harsher sentence to blacks)!
I mean, really? Just how deranged is the US media.
Ah—try this one, instead.
That shows how effectively our host and his minions work–in the background–to keep us all safe from careless, rampant italicization.
Indeed.
Judging by the behind-the-scenes fixing I do, I’d assumed you heathens just flailed randomly at the keyboard. While on choppy seas, in the dark, during a seizure of some kind.
[…] just flailed randomly at the keyboard.
..gazes longingly at the softball hanging in the air.
you heathens just flailed randomly at the keyboard. While on choppy seas, in the dark, during a seizure of some kind.
So we’re…impoverished refugees with disabilities? And you mock us? Tsk tsk. I sense a mutiny stirring among the henchlesbians.
I once flailed at the keyboard and not only bought myself a caravan without wheels on Ebay but got myself a wife from Thailand (who may, or may not be a man.)
I thought at the time I was writing a novel. You can’t be too careful.
I never meant to imply that Sam was prone to carelessness; I meant only to volunteer as an insurance policy against any future slip-up. As they say, there are two groups of sailors: those who’ve run aground in the past, and those who will run aground in the future. (Membership in the latter group is universal.)
“Sam (not Duncan)”
It is confusing, isn’t it? I which I’d gone with “Peregrine FitzLoosely”.
Sex as a pursuit has been pretty constant, despite what horrific situations are thrust upon people. Children are born (therefore sex occurs at the rate tha allows for children to be born) in refugee camps, war-torn environments, during the Holodomor, or (the grandmaster of shitty places) North Korea – to name a few. So, if many people in the US are too traumatised for sex because Trump, then by extension the US is even more traumatising than these places. I had no idea, I’ll let everyone in Kakuma know that it could be worse.
By the way David, I tried using one of the towels to wipe down my chair but it cracked in half and the other patrons ducked for cover.
I’d assumed you heathens just flailed randomly at the keyboard. While on choppy seas, in the dark, during a seizure of some kind.
Oh, no, no no. That’s what one’s cat getting on the keyboard is for.
Back when I had a large CRT, and cats, the top of the monitor was a favorite perching spot.