Imagine Being This Bint

I bring you the deep thoughts of Ms Lily Kaplan. Or more precisely, the thoughts of her peers and educators, regurgitated wholesale in a Valley-Girl vocal fry:

Angry Leftist woman publishes negative review of a restaurant because she thinks it’s too “White”

She says it gives off vibes of “racism, misogyny, and ped*philia” because two White men own it.

If you live in the Phoenix area, consider supporting this restaurant. pic.twitter.com/wDGr0rKzpf

— Libs of TikTok (@libsoftiktok) June 16, 2026

Quizzed on her assumptions, Ms Kaplan, a “social media consultant,” says,

And so, not knowing or caring, Ms Kaplan felt entitled to smear a local business, for likes and online clout, with a pre-emptively “unfriendly review,” in which she somehow associates the selling of tacos and carrot cake with “racism, misogyny and paedophilia,” and while describing the opening of a restaurant by two white men as representing “centuries of patriarchy,” and “such a bummer.”

For those of you sturdy enough to endure more of her voice, Ms Kaplan replies to her critics here. Albeit in a rambling and immensely self-flattering manner:

Her latest video doubling down. She’s beyond a misandrist and an absolute moron. pic.twitter.com/e2MXMibxXS

— TC (@tcgoldrush) June 16, 2026

Disdaining strangers, especially men, for being white, as if it were some invalidating condition, isn’t racism, you see, all appearance to the contrary. It’s “punching upwards,” and therefore virtuous, indeed heroic. It’s “speaking truth to power.” And white men as a notional group – including unsuspecting restaurant proprietors – are, it seems, in need of some punching.

Those who suggest otherwise are, and I quote, “fucking idiots.”

Readers may wish to try downing a shot of tequila every time she says “white” in a weary, sneery, but in-no-way-racist way. Inevitably, Ms Kaplan is keen to tell us how she’s “so for real.” “I definitely speak my mind,” says she.

Or at least someone else’s.