I Feel Safer Already

I’m reminded of a story my father told me many moons ago about Fred Truman, which is probably apocryphal.
Playing in a far away country where umpires weren’t renowned for being disinterested and objective he’d had a number of LBW appeals turned down. Eventually, in frustration he turned to the umpire and said “.. you cheating black bastard” quick as a falsh he continued ” and if you’d been white I’d have called you a cheating white bastard…”

I hate courgettes but please don’t grass me up

So South Yorkshire Police have learned nowt! Fear of being hatey resulted in them ignoring rapey behaviour by local adherents of the Religion of Peace. What else will their anti-hate ideology lead them to overlook?

Good to know the police can waste police time.

Non-British readers might not realise that South Yorkshire is where the police farce failed – for more than a decade – to address child rape and exploitation on a scale that would be shocking if it happened in an African war zone.

Report non-crime to the peelers ?

In addition to reporting hate crime, please report non-crime hate incidents, which can include things like offensive or insulting comments, online, in person or in writing.

WTF, over.*
*(N.B. Yorkshire 5-0: that is pure curiosity, not a thing like offensive or insulting comments, online, in person or in writing.)

Violent crime has soared in South Yorkshire by a staggering 62 per cent in the last year…
To be fair, if I was a South Yorkshire cop armed only with a day-glo yellow vest, a can of pepper spray and a glorified car antenna, going after the mean tweeters would appear to be a preferable assignment over going after the stabby and shooty types.*
*(N.B. Yorkshire 5-0: that is just an observation from a ‘Murkan, not a thing like offensive or insulting comments, online, in person or in writing.)

N.B. Yorkshire 5-0 . . .
Careful, Farnsworth. Yorkshire’s finest may have an international crimes division charged with decoding ‘Muricans’ I.P. addresses in order to send Interpol after your ass or at least bar you from entry the next time some earl invites you to tea.
(Although, now that I think about it, why would an international “hate tweet” division for the Yorkshire P.D. be any more ludicrous than what’s going on now?)

Wait a minute. Wait a goddamn minute. Sherman’s been wearing my swirly green Typepad avatar. Identity theft! Someone call South Yorkshire Police!
I’ve been violated online.

Forgive a colonial for not remembering the specifics, but was it Yorkshire that was roundly mocked last year for their self-congratulatory public relations blitz showing all of the “dangerous” weapons that they had taken off of the streets?
As the officers proudly showed off the arsenal taken from never-do-wells, people noted that it consisted mainly of scissors, screwdrivers, and a couple of carving knives. And while any of these things could be used as a weapon in a pinch, they were more of the “makeshift” weapon variety.
Surprisingly few guns, grenades, or even bows and arrows were shown. And by few, I mean none. The so-called arsenal looked like the contents of a typical bloke’s backyard shed a generation back, and the police did not appear to have thought through the public reaction to their media blitz.
I’m not remembering exactly where in England it was, but the general consensus then, as now, was “Seriously, you have time for this nonsense? Aren’t there real crimes you could be looking at?”

Looking at the uniforms in the main photo, it appears that Panda and Teddy are not Police officers, but Community Safety Officers who are as much use as a chocolate tea pot (hope they’re not offended by that description, which is based on personal knowledge and experience). This does not excuse those Police officers who act in a way not suited to their appointment and, in my opinion, they should hand in their warrant cards.

Apparently all crime there has ceased, forcing the police to find other ways of occupying their time.
As noted recently, it’s curious how the less an organisation can be counted on to perform its core functions, the more likely it is to overreach into other areas. And so police forces that seem dismissive of burglary and negligent in the face of rape gangs will nonetheless find time and resources to chastise people for being rude on Twitter, or to classify whistling as a “hate crime,” or to have their male officers parade around in heels and nail polish.
Supposedly to reassure the community.

Insulting comments “will not be tolerated.”
Evidently the only permissible attitude for the English is complete obeisence to their new overlords neighbours.

Heh…just seeing this as much use as a chocolate tea pot. Is that a somewhat common idiom over yonder or was that truly from (im)practical experience? Either way, I’m stealing it. Assuming my swiss cheese brain will remember it 20 minutes from now.

To the tune of “Men of Harlech”
Cops of Yorkshire, lie ye dreaming ?
There are villians ever tweeting,
With their insults loudly screeching,
On the internet.
Comments are astounding,
Non-crime is abounding,
All must make the 999 call,
Ere the trollish comments fall.
Cops of Yorkshire, avoid the gory
This will ever be your story,
Knives and guns, and cars are crashing,
But harsh words go to gaol !
(N.B. Yorkshire Police, all citizens of the UK have thoroughly denounced this post)

I’ve contracted a nasty case of tagitis from someone, and the spam trap god needs a little supplication.

and the spam trap god needs a little supplication.
She’s a capricious deity. I’m not sure why she’s taken a dislike to you. Anyway, the fatted oxen seem to have done the trick.

Can I report the Yorkshire police to the Yorkshire police? They’re certainly hateful enough.

At any rate, it appears that The Yorkshire Plod have more fodder upon which to crack down.
Another godforsaken news site with auto-play video. Auto-play video that follows you around the page and, when closed, reopens at the top of the page, playing again, with sound.
I wish weeping facial sores on those responsible.

Speaking of crime and punishment, “Here’s a mini thread to clarify what a “gulag” is, for those who only have heard it being used as a buzzword and why sending a bigot to one is actually a compassionate, non-violent course of action…”

It gets worse –

LGBTQ+ Goldsmiths
@lgbtqgold
Long story short, friends, the ideas of TERFs and anti trans bigots literally *kill* and must be eradicated through reeducation. Science must be decolonised and de-essentialised in order for this to happen.

Reeducation ? There is a name for the camps the commies sent people to for that, but it escapes me for some reason.

The obvious question : what exactly do they plan to do about all of the committers of non-crime that get reported? I tend to be cynical about bureaucracy but I’ve often found I’m not cynical enough; I would suggest the perpetrators of these non-crimes will be put in a database for future punishment. Perhaps individual acts of jerkishness will be collated together and punished as “harassment” of a group/class. They’ll think of something.

What if I give a self-propelled pillar box the hairy eyeball?
Depends, is it a hairy eyeball with intent to commit stink eye, that will get you a caution, hairy eyeball with intent to commit Il Maloccio will get you nicked.

Unrelated, except for the stupid factor, Science !

except for the stupid factor
Just wait until she finds out where Johnson & Johnson get the babies for their Baby Oil.

“Here’s a mini thread to clarify what a “gulag” is… actually a compassionate, non-violent course of action…”
Sadly, said item disappeared before I could savour it, due to the LGBTQ+ Society of Goldsmiths University “protecting their tweets temporarily for the sake of safeguarding.” Safeguarding what is left to the imagination. Though as one wag put it, “Not sure there is anything more 2018 than a *gay rights activist* explaining the positive benefits of gulags.”
Truly, we live in an age of wonders.

Sadly, said item disappeared before I could savour it
Well, it did get reported to…ahem..the South Yorkshire police, so no doubt the tweets were seized as evidence and the perpetrators have been promptly apprehended. (Here are the screenshots, though.)

The Pythons were on to this a generation ago:
Presenter: Most of the strange tales concern Dinsdale, but what about Doug? One man who met him was Luigi Vercotti.
Vercotti: I had been running a successful escort agency — high class, no really, high class girls — we didn’t have any of *that* — that was right out. And I decided (phone rings) Excuse me (he answers phone) Hello……no, not now……shtoom…shtoom….right……yes, we’ll have the watch ready for you at midnight…….the watch…..the Chinese watch….yes, right-oh, bye-bye…..mother (he hangs up phone) Anyway I decided to open a high class night club for the gentry at Biggleswade with international cuisine and cooking and top line acts, and not a cheap clip joint for picking up tarts — that was right out, I deny that completely –, and one evening in walks Dinsdale with a couple of big lads, one of whom was carrying a tactical nuclear missile. They said I had bought one of their fruit machines and would I pay for it.
2nd Interviewer: How much did they want?
Vercotti: They wanted three quarters of a million pounds.
2nd Interviewer: Why didn’t you call the police?
Vercotti: Well I had noticed that the lad with the thermonuclear device was the chief constable for the area. So a week later they called again and told me the cheque had bounced and said… I had to see… Doug.
2nd Interviewer: Doug?
Vercotti: Doug (takes a drink) Well, I was terrified. Everyone was terrified of Doug. I’ve seen grown men pull their own heads off rather than see Doug. Even Dinsdale was frightened of Doug.
2nd Interviewer: What did he do?
Vercotti: He used… sarcasm. He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, pathos, puns, parody, litotes and… satire. He was vicious.

Meanwhile, also in Yorkshire…

LBC’s Nick Ferrari has some fun with this story.

Squires,
It’s funny how you know the truth about melanin and melatonin is extracted from the same thing which is DNA and it can be used as a sleep aid but that’s not what they made it for.
She’s precious.
Work is slow this week (yikes), and I’m a bit bored at this moment. I’m tempted to post that at 4Chan, including a link to her insane Twitter, and see what happens.

I’m tempted to post that at 4Chan, including a link to her insane Twitter, and see what happens.
Do it!
That Goldsmith’s link above, and many posts by our gracious host, show what a lot of that crowd think and know about science…
It’s enough to drive a rational person to drink.

David,
“I wonder, do police officers have any inkling of how much damage is being done to their standing among the public?”
My suspicion, particularly with respect to those who control the levers of power within our institutions is that they are very aware indeed. The Theodore Dalrymple quote below gives some hint as to the why.
“In my study of communist societies, I came to the conclusion that the purpose of communist propaganda was not to persuade or convince, not to inform, but to humiliate; and therefore, the less it corresponded to reality the better. When people are forced to remain silent when they are being told the most obvious lies, or even worse when they are forced to repeat the lies themselves, they lose once and for all their sense of probity. To assent to obvious lies is…in some small way to become evil oneself. One’s standing to resist anything is thus eroded, and even destroyed. A society of emasculated liars is easy to control. I think if you examine political correctness, it has the same effect and is intended to.”
https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/124952-in-my-study-of-communist-societies-i-came-to-the