Faced with complaints from parents about the indoctrination of children, an official in Rockwood School District, Missouri, instructed teachers to create two sets of curriculum: a false one to share with parents, and then the real set of curriculum, focused on topics like activism and privilege.

These instructions were sent to all middle and high school principals in the district. “This is not being deceitful,” wrote Natalie Fallert, the official in question, before adding, “I hate that we are even having to have this conversation.” 

It occurs to me that when your solution to such complaints includes the words “so parents cannot see it,” it may be time to revisit your assumptions. A subsequent non-apology, issued by a different official when the instructions to deceive became more widely known, insisted that the school district views parents as “allies” in the education of “our children.”

An unhappy phrasing, all things considered. 

Pronouns, obviously:

You see, the tiresomeness of it all is for your own good. And besides, escape is forbidden. 

Update, via the comments:

Readers may, I suspect, have reservations. But do bear in mind that ostracising people and engaging in petty workplace spite – calling them Nazis, for instance – is so much easier when you know who they voted for. And do take a moment to consider the oppressed in this equation, by which, of course, I mean the needy and neurotic, those whose status and self-worth hinge on mouthing – and being seen and heard to mouth – the most fashionable political opinions. Now, imagine these poor souls being denied the opportunity to bore others with them, at eye-watering length, during office hours.

Consider this an open thread, in which to share links and bicker.

What? Oh yes.

Buttocks.

We live in strange times. || Words of wisdom. || Cat is wise. || Confounded cat. || Accessories plus case, circa 1900. || When you’re all fired up and righteous but it’s the wrong colour carjacker. || Cover version of note. || Why beavers don’t rule the… oh. || Gibsmedat. || Loveliness detected. (h/t, Captain Nemo) || Duck-related drama. (h/t, Damian) || Transparent lifeform. || Suboptimal sofa situation. || A brief history of gin and tonic. || The gods, they mock us. || Radical solution, bound to work. || I believe they’re called sneakers. || Type detected: “I’ve been trying to educate you.” || Feel the love. || No pushing, form an orderly line. || And finally, from Brazil, please remain calm while you are being rescued.

For newcomers and the nostalgic, more items from the archives:

Imagine The Picnics.

Emily Zak wants us to know that fresh air and countryside are, like everything else, terribly oppressive.

Naturally, Ms Zak has an extensive, at times bewildering list of excuses for why any outdoors recreation should be tinged with guilt and wretchedness. From the claim that, “our society leverages natural spaces as a tool for capitalism and colonialism,” to the “toxic binary expectations we have about gender.” To spare you the tedium, I’ll summarise: If you can’t borrow a tent or don’t have a pair of suitable shoes, and if you don’t see enough adverts featuring gay people kayaking, and kayaking in a discernibly gay-affirming manner, it turns out you’re being oppressed by society.

Pantomime.

A balding, middle-aged transvestite, a sociology lecturer, wishes to confuse your children.

Dr Cremin doesn’t seem to grasp, or isn’t willing to admit, that his craving for public transgression – to, as he puts it, “sow gender confusion in kids” – by which he means young people over whom he has leverage – reveals quite a lot about his character. And his fitness to teach. I hate to sound prim, but if I were – God help me – a sociology student, I doubt I’d be reassured by the fact that my lecturer felt entitled to use the classroom as a venue for his transvestite fetish. It does rather suggest a pathological level of self-involvement and raises a suspicion that students may find themselves playing captive audience to – or being reluctant participants in – some personal psychodrama. A kind of power game. Some variation of, “I can do this and you can’t stop me without being accused of bigotry.”

They Come To Teach Us.

Polite man encounters Mao-lings. Mao-lings lose their minds, scream abuse, then assault him.