Friday Ephemera
Dinnertime scenes. (h/t, Dicentra) || At last, 2-D Doom. || Cheeseburger aerodynamics. || Gives good tongue. || The tactical dad hoodie you’ve always wanted. || Hi, there. || Like many housewives, she knows the mortifying horror of hairy stairs. || Heh. || Also heh. (h/t, Dicentra) || Just how hard is magic? || Painted meat. || Privacy is “transphobic” and politely indulging transgender pronouns is “expressing transphobia.” || “Inflatable pads allow you to adjust the size of your pectorals, deltoids, biceps and triceps.” || Porthole scenes. || Improbable space suits and other things. || Space type generator. || Fashion tip. || Last meals. (h/t, Things) || No greater love. || And finally, niche satisfactions, #209.
How to deal with hate mail
G. Gordon Liddy, the Watergate burglar, had a radio show. Really. He was a much better interviewer than he was a burglar. Anyway, he used to conduct dramatic readings of his hate mail. They were pretty entertaining!
“Just how hard is magic?”
“What’s harder: conjuring a frog into existence, or turning it into a mouse? Levitating a frog, or teleporting it?”
Those things are equally difficult because they are all impossible.
G. Gordon Liddy, the Watergate burglar, had a radio show. Really. He was a much better interviewer than he was a burglar. Anyway, he used to conduct dramatic readings of his hate mail.
That reminds me that one of the more entertaining conceptual artists out there, poet Kenny Goldsmith, used to have a show on public radio. During one episode he basically performed an opera version of Harry Potter – singing it out live on air.
EVERYONE looks transgender.
I identify as trans-dragon-kyn and I’ll thank you to recognise the inherent dragonness in me.
At last, 2-D Doom.
However . . .
Gives good tongue.
From one or two Ephemera back, or at least the video of it.
Porthole scenes.
Presenting the guaranteed world’s largest front load washing machine.
No greater love.
Mattis 3:16
“I was a Macedonian fake news writer”
Cheeseburger aerodynamics.
They used supercomputers to design the aerodynamics of Pringles chips. They are so light and produced so fast that if the shape isn’t just right, they wll fly off the production conveyor belt.
Ex-student, 52, suing university for AU$3m after PhD rejection destroyed ‘sex drive’
The gender neutral toilets were branded as transphobic because the (floor to ceiling) partitions make it impossible to peep at people in adjoining cubicles. Transactivists say that’s transphobic as it assumes people might try to peep on others.
Pandering to the mentally ill never works out.
I’m thinking of crowdfunding “Fuck your pronouns’ t-shirts.
Privacy is “transphobic”…
This should be right up their alley (NPI) then.
The porthole scene?
Sudden attack of nostalgia as I recall my favorite ride at Disneyland as a youth was the Submarine Voyage.
A boy and his …. awwwwww
Her job was to churn out semi-plagiarised copies of articles originally published on US extreme right-wing publications, so that her boss could serve them back to unsuspecting Americans thousands of miles away.
How very odd that the other end of the political spectrum doesn’t do such a thing.
Oh, wait…
Much of what she produced was misinformation based on real events, written in a way to provoke fear and anger among its readers. In the aggregate, the stories gave a false, skewed view of the world, playing to people’s prejudices.
Of course. Everyone has heard of CNN.
This should be right up their alley (NPI) then.
Armor week at Fort Knox, 1977. WW2 barracks, just like the ones pictured, only with 2 lines so you could wave at each other.
All Quiet On The Western Front had a page or so describing something similar, only with open air.
https://babylonbee.com/news/12-obsolete-manly-activities-and-what-you-can-replace-them-with
Most of these were lame, but I liked the pickle-jar one. There’s a brand of jelly I really like that seems to have the lids welded on. I can’t even open them with a jar opener. Father (when he was alive), Son, friends, neighbors—jelly-jar squad to the rescue! Oddly enough, my father was able to open the jars until a couple of months before his death although his hand tremor had become very bad.
Had no idea jar-opening was so Controversial and Problematic. 😳
Porthole scenes.
When someone chunders into their gas mask.
Morning, all.
When someone chunders into their gas mask.
Chunder, great word. Damned Australians.
Those things are equally difficult because they are all impossible.
You’d think that impossibility would be a condition without degrees, but fantasy dramas often depend on the assumption that This Impossible Thing is more taxing than This Other Impossible Thing. It’s like with superhero films. If the power levels of a character are too vague or depicted inconsistently, the thing tends to fall apart.
Dinnertime scenes.
Just the salad for me, thanks.
You will memorise and repeat.
Moby wants you to know how woke he is, ladies.
Privacy is “transphobic”…
@Farnsworth, Looks like the military is the same anywhere in the world
SADF Soldiers “Riding Gokarts” during the bush war
You will memorise and repeat.
Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength.
A boy and his …. huuuuuuh?
.
Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength.
I’m sure they’re all highly qualified doctors and engineers, and a source of great enrichment. It’s strange to live with the feeling that many of our cultural and political institutions are not merely uninterested in preserving our civilisation, but are actively determined to bring about its downfall.
No greater love.
It’s the earliest Porsche, the sole remaining pre-war KdF-Wagen based Type 64 and it could be yours for a mere $20 million or so.
When someone chunders into their gas mask.
I used to do a sort of half-arsed impersonation of “being a racing driver”. I was never good enough to turn pro, but I was an enthusiastic amateur and shared my passion for seeing how close I could come to killing or maiming myself at high speed with some excellent people. Not for us this “my body is a temple/no drinking the night before a race” crap; we never went anywhere without a well-thumbed copy of the Michelin Guide. In a six hour race at Spa-Francorchamps I was driving at night in the penultimate stint of a six-hour race, sharing the drive with two others. The previous night we had indulged ourselves somewhat, but only one of us had eaten lobster, i.e. the guy to whom I was about to hand over. Having been shown the “IN” board I arrived at our pit garage to be greeted by pandemonium- our other driver, who had completed his driving duties when I got in and who was already three or four beers to the good, was desperately pulling on his race suit over his street clothes whilst his wife searched for his crash-helmet and gloves.
“Go and do a couple more laps whilst we get things sorted” shouted our “team manager”, another borderline alcoholic petrolhead/gourmand who only took on the job because he was unable to drive fast as he suffered from motion sickness.
So out I went and when I came back and we’d despatched the slightly-woozy pilot into the night (he set a personal best lap time during that stint, all down to Dutch courage) I discovered that the lobster-eater, who had been lying on a bunk in the truck all day, groaning and turning a delicate shade of lime green, had declared himself “fit to race”. He got up, washed his face and, suited and booted in Nomex, waited for yours truly to arrive back at the pits. On being given the warning “ninety seconds!” he put on his balaclava and then his full-face crash helmet, pulled down the visor, nodded to his wife….
….and projectile-vomited into said helmet.
He was known ever-after as “Radiohead” because according to our pit crew what happened resembled nothing so much as this, on fast forward.
And finally, niche satisfactions, #209.
*fetches vacuum cleaner, looks for wife*
*fetches vacuum cleaner, looks for wife*
Do let us know how it goes. Assuming you survive, I mean.
Improbable space suits ? Someone needs to read up on the subject at Atomic Rockets
A boy and his …. awwwwww
Great cow like that, hope they don’t eat her all at once.
“No greater love” reminded me of this
WW2 barracks, just like the ones pictured…
Yep, picture is from Ft. Lostinthewoods.
…2 lines so you could wave at each other.
Not unlike the tropical/desert burnout barrel latrines with the screens halfway up so you can chat with whomever is next in line.
niche satisfactions
Curious what this is all about. Saw someone do it to their kid and I presumed it was a joke thing to keep him from getting in trouble. Is there some thrill aspect to it? Or was it in some movie I was supposed to see but stubbornly didn’t and this is my punishment. To wander the world like a modern Diogenes wondering what is the point of it all. It’s that last thing isn’t it? Go on, admit it.
Is there some thrill aspect to it?
I’m not buying that innocent routine.
Is there some thrill aspect to it?
I suppose in a way it’s the opposite of this. Or if not quite the opposite, somewhat orthogonal.
At a former employer, an employee was fired after he wedged himself under the stall partition occupied by another employee. In his defense he said he just wanted to say “Hi!”.
You’d think that impossibility would be a condition without degrees, but fantasy dramas often depend on the assumption that This Impossible Thing is more taxing than This Other Impossible Thing….
Then it’s not impossible within the rules of that fantasy.
And if it’s a fantasy drama then which things are more difficult is a question settled in fantasy rather than science, dependent entirely on the fantasy world that has been invented.
Back to bed. Too much of a fever to even deal with this fine blog.
I’m so old I remember when MTV used to have music videos, but;
Welcome to “Chlamydia Island”, where the you don’t swipe right when you see the clap emoji…
To the Ozzie failed PhD student: harassment, stress, persecution and threats are not a bug in the PhD system, they are its main feature.
If you can’t get a PhD in sociology, go for an Ed D. In my experience, many people who have such degrees insist on being referred to as “Doctor”.
Failing that – a near impossibility – he could try changing his first name.
Chlamydia Island
From the makers of I’m a Diabetic, Get Me Out of Here!
…the movement of people due to, for whatever reason, not finding where they previously lived to be acceptable.
But we musn’t dwell on that fact…
@Lancastrian Oik
Great story, and I’m jealous as hell! You ever get to drive/race the Nordschleife? That’s on the bucket list for me. In the meantime I must settle for a few laps around a local circuit in a Lambo. Woe is me.
Speaking of embarrassing automotive moments…
Why you never hire a millennial art or angry studies grad from either coast when you need a military photoshop job.
Why you never hire a millennial art or angry studies grad from either coast when you need a military photoshop job.
It’s a special-order AirSoft rifle. It shoots the entire unexploded cartridge. The cartridge explodes when it hits the target. 😉
Why are harassment, threats, etc. so important to the PhD system?
“At last, 2-D Doom.”
Get it while it’s hot. There used to be a text adventure and an RPG, but Id had them taken down.
“Space type generator.”
Or “When Hipsters Meet the Demoscene”.
“Great story, and I’m jealous as hell!”
Me too. Kudos simply for having driven at Spa. I freely confess to having a little bit of a man-crush now. Never had the money (or the skill (or the nerve)) to try racing myself. Classic armchair fan, that’s me.
Because cat.