With Each Thrust
From the New York Times, Jennifer Medina on sex education for teenagers:
Consent from the person you are kissing — or more — is not merely silence or a lack of protest, Shafia Zaloom, a health educator at the Urban School of San Francisco, told the students. They listened raptly, but several did not disguise how puzzled they felt. “What does that mean — you have to say ‘yes’ every 10 minutes?” asked Aidan Ryan, 16, who sat near the front of the room. “Pretty much,” Ms. Zaloom answered. “It’s not a timing thing, but whoever initiates things to another level has to ask.
So what I’m wondering is, how do you combine “making sure each step is met” with “oral assent” in advance – a kind of self-conscious box-tickery – with a sense of, well, wild abandon? “I’m planning to reach for your bra strap, my volcanic love muffin. Is that okay?”
just unplug the thing!
Oh dear.
Maybe if I cross-connect these circuits…
And invert the Indignation Modulator…
Yes, that should do it.
I mean, what could possibly…
And so, dear reader, Western Civilisation was ended – by Feminist Indignation…
(PID trigger warning)
I really don’t see what the problem is. You’re all giving this knee-jerk reaction instead of trying to imaginatively explore how this will revolutionize male/female/cis/trans relationships. Twenty years from now, when the revolution is complete, cis-rape will be a thing of the past, and girls will find it perfectly natural – even easy – to constantly clarify their intentions. Sex will be easy and natural, just like we’ve always wanted it to be:
Oh god, I’m so horny.
Yes.
Yes!
Take it off.
Touch me there.
Oh yes!
Mmmmmm, put it in.
I want it.
Yes.
Yes!
Deeper.
Oh, I love it.
Harder!
Oh yes! Yes!
As an added bonus, fear of retroactive post-coital revisionary rape will paralyze the orgasmic centers of the brain unless the woman unlocks them with wild exaggerations. This will allow her to control the length of the encounter with finely-tuned utterances such as:
Oh god, I’ve never been f***ed so good.
It feels so big!
Mmmmmmm, you can do me any time!
Want to try something different this time?
My family’s lawyer passed away last night.
So you see, Feminism is clearly just a clever trick by the Patriarchy to get women to roleplay cheap porno flicks. And that’s without considering the contrition she will feel if she misses a few beats (I’ve been sooooo naughty!) or the conflation of male and female pronouns ((Mister + Ma’am)/2 ==> Master).
“Oral assent” might be difficult if your mouth is, er, full
I thought he meant that a head nodding up and down counts as assent even if it is more of a bobbing motion.
Another Jonathan
Very droll. But this pedant finds ‘added bonus’ an irritating redundancy on a par with ‘free gift’, ‘safe haven’, ‘completely surrounded’, ‘end result’, ‘future plans’….
*takes medication and calms down*
A mild suggestion for a technical solution:
The engineer’s solution:
Everyone who participates in the regulated activity needs to purchase a simple push-button device which controls a separate panel with a red light and a green light. During the regulated activity, each participant must hold down the button on the controller that illuminates the green light, which shall remain visible to the other party(ies) at all times. If, at any time, a participant releases this button, the green light goes off, and a red light comes on. Optionally, a siren could start to sound, to summon outside assistance.
These days, with Wifi and Bluetooth, I bet you could make the controller wireless and small enough to easily hold in one hand, leaving the other hand free for other activites. And, of course, the government could set it up to monitor any proceedings and gather “data” to refine the system.
I bet the Chinese could get something set up in a few weeks, and have it in stores by Xmas!
Failure to use such a device is cause to dismiss later allegations that consent was not given.
Batteries not included.
rxe,
” And, of course, the government could set it up to monitor any proceedings and gather “data” to refine the system.”
Then there is the danger of being hacked.
Would prove a legal minefield, “she gave consent all the way through your honourableness, I was hacked”.
You see?
[i]And, of course, the government could set it up to monitor any proceedings and gather “data” to refine the system.[/i]
Many millions would need to be spent fighting consent-hacks; a new wave of cybercrime where a person’s consent controller is penetrated with a virus and is manipulated in order to show false compliance.
Sales of Trojan condoms will decline precipitously
Jimmy,
“Many millions would need to be spent fighting consent-hacks; a new wave of cybercrime where a person’s consent controller is penetrated with a virus and is manipulated in order to show false compliance.”
“penetrated”…..??!!!
I’m triggered…
Where’s my teddy bear and fluffy slippers?……
PS …”virus”????……..That’s as clear case of HIV-ism as I’ve ever seen……
Who’s your diversity rep??
Jimmy,
and as for your use of the grossly offensive term “manipulated”…….1
Well I’m so very very offended….
Jones,
Your feeling means nothing to me! ahaha…
hang on, there’s a loud knock at the door…
*crashing sounds*
HI THIS IS REALLY JIMMY HERE, IM SORRY ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS EVERYTHING IS FINE NOW IM GOING ON HOLIDAY FOR A LONG TIME BYE
Oh, what?
Are we back on the ‘Consent Checklist’ again? Didn’t Sandra Fluke sweep all that away forever when she told the world that she was so busy copulating that she couldn’t afford to buy condoms?