Another do-it-yourself, I’m afraid, so by all means share your own links and oddities in the comments. I’ll set the ball rolling with a guide to the five stages; why friends don’t let friends write for the Guardian; how to swear in sign language; a real-time map of tracked traffic; and a heart-warming tale of when car-jacking goes awry. 

Oh, and via dicentra: Anyone need a lift?  

Don’t try this at home. No, really. Don’t. || A heartwarming moment of cross-cultural bonding. (h/t, Holborn) || How to make a blockbuster movie trailer. || It seems we need a bigger bomb-bay. || Impress your friends with fingertip bling. || A partial list of parenthetical pop songs. || Wouldn’t it be nice. || Riposte of note. || A partial success. || Always respect the media. || So many X-Men. || This. (h/t, Damian) || Air conditioner with bonus features. || All aboard. || Debussy plays Debussy, 1913. || Enterprise-D virtual tour revisited. Watch out for the dead crew member and the creepy apparition in the turbolift. || Handmade oak and brass phone cases. || On the origins of chili con carne. || No, you first. || And finally, especially for American readers, “Look, the stars are coming out.”

Farewell, old friend. (h/t, Damian) || High-speed fabulousness is now a thing. || Lifestyle choice. Choose wisely, children. || A compendium of skillz. (h/t, Obnoxio) || The interactive Bluetooth mood-light salt dispenser you’ve all been waiting for. || Today’s word is tonguebath. || Best done outdoors. || He does this better than you do. || Today’s other word is busted. (h/t, Tim) || Bond title sequences. || At last, a sweat towel for your ta-tas. || Illusion of note. || Kayaking through a cargo ship. || Ye internet of yore. || Voyage ongoing. || Grievance is easy. || The swinging Sixties. || Wardrobe solutions. || Something error happen. || Tiny desktop dramas. || Masculine Women and Feminine Men, 1932. || And finally, the absurd tragedy of the Great London Beer Flood of 1814.

As time was short this week, you’ll have to throw together your own pile of links and oddities in the comments. I will, however, set the ball rolling with, via Obnoxio, some classy signage; a collection of people posing for photographs with their television sets; a map showing the concentration of metal bands in Europe per million residents; some more Korean rap care of Elephants Gerald; and a reminder that among this world’s wonders are amateur video guides to public lavatories.

Oh, and this. 

Act casual, say nothing. || Moonshiner’s cow shoe. || Meanwhile, in Scotland, life goes on as normal. (h/t, Holborn) || I suspect these are bigger than yours. (h/t, Pogonip) || Hey, it’s a job. || Ideal for peeling grapes and then sewing them back in their skins, the Da Vinci robotic surgical system. || Renting pandas. || Chimney pots. || Where did all the sperm go? || Why parents rarely want their children to be artists, part 19. (h/t, Stephen) || This. (h/t, Julia) || That. || Gusty. || Going rogue. || Girth, thickness and ellipticity: On the shapes of eggs. || “The germs which are in the mouth have spoken to a child!” (h/t, Elephants Gerald) || Tristan goes exploring. || Roman roads of Britain. || Ice fishing basics. || Da Vinci’s notebooks. || Sequel of note. || And finally, how to attract a crowd.

This is one of these. // Attention, all fashion-conscious gentlemen. (h/t, Julia) // Why people get dashcams. // Where cash is (nearly) obsolete. // Students on socialism. // Lab-grown capillaries. // Lesbians, 1965. // Lauv. // On colour in film. // Fish farms, from above. // Seen from below. (h/t, Damian) // A brief history of cellophane. // Deconstructed cow. // An archive of vintage Galaxy magazines. // And one of Amazing Stories. // Tag is a pro sport. // Something error happen. // “Maintenance on this track has been deferred for a long time.” // “When she was seen two weeks after… her eyes felt a lot more comfortable.” // Chopsticks of note. // Two for the price of one. // I do like the planes. // And finally, via Elephants Gerald and probably best with subtitles, Song of Bolo.

She’s a big girl. // He’s a big girl. // Vertical exercise bike. // The world’s longest running lab experiment, complete with gripping live feed. // Maglev self-levelling elevator goes up and down, also sideways and diagonally. // Cheap old houses. TLC not included. // Looking for lodgers? // Homeland of tea. // Yes, but is the coffee any good? // A dossier of monsters. // The squid and the whale. // I’m pretty sure he does this better than you do. // Oh, what are the humans doing now? // No, after you. // Pea salad. // Pecking order. // “Just don’t provoke them,” he reassured. (h/t, Julia) // A collection of period Maoist posters. // “Sometimes they can act like a solid.” // At last, your very own private island. // And finally, rather emphatically, there may be some softening of the metal.

Time, I think, for a little test of musical discernment. So, Korean or Hasidic? 

Simpler times. // Less so. // “Mysterious stains everywhere” and other low-rent hotel horrors. // How sperm whales sleep. // At last, snortable chocolate. // His grip is better than yours. // Battery University. (h/t, Dr W) // Uncombable hair syndrome. // Almost Eighties. // Cocktails 101. Yes, there will be a test later. // Japanese playgrounds. // This just in. // This is one of these. // $15. // Photographing the Moon with a Game Boy camera. // The hazards of golf. // A vet’s life. (h/t, Damian) // Bit chilly out. // Your one-stop shop for Chicago murder stats. // Chinese rap is a thing that exists. (h/t, Elephants Gerald) // And finally, futuristically, “The motors are controlled by pressure sensors in your shoes, under your toes, and communicate to the thumb via Bluetooth connection.”

When your meticulously planned attempt at bank robbery is cut short. // Close enough. // Under London. // When men lactate. // LSD ‘microdosing’ is apparently a thing now. // Planet X is cloaked. // Plus one. // Pedal cars of yore. // Showbiz. // Hombre. // Birth of the camera phone. // Feel my babies. // Place your bets. // On Britain’s collective tea-making menace. // Animated bodies. // Paper puppets. // 1970s Spider-Man. // Cityscapes of note. // Tornado. // Storm. // Squirrel combing. // “A flight in China was delayed for five hours after an elderly passenger threw coins into the aircraft’s engine for good luck.” // And finally, rather pleasingly, “When a security developer was contacted by an IRS phone scammer, he decided to do more than simply ignore their call.”