Clientele
It occurs to me that if you’re running a “trans-owned LGBTQIA+ bookshop and coffee shop” – “queer books, queer haircuts, queer coffee” – yes, queer coffee – and your patrons have to be reminded, via “guidelines displayed on each table,” of how to behave like even minimally civilised people, then you may want to seek out a better class of patron.
Please maintain good personal hygiene out of consideration for other customers.
That’s before we get to the bits about “violent, abusive, and disruptive behaviour” and, inevitably, “crisis support.” And yet, despite the somewhat concerning reminders about violence and basic hygiene, what caught my eye was the bit about taking your craft projects home with you when you leave.
Yes, today’s word is littering. Why do you ask?
For those of you intrigued – and I can feel the hum of excitement in the room – temptations include Sad Dyke Poetry Night – two hours of mournful lesbians, first Friday of every month – “open to all emotions and all identities” – plus lots of talks about mental health, and Queer Yarn, an evening of “fibre craft” every other Saturday afternoon.
There’s also a Queer Art Takeover, in which suitably queer artists are invited to “rent a shelf” to display their creative outpourings and general queerness. And those best-selling pronoun pins are now back in stock.
Oh, and Palestinian cola drinks. Obviously.
Update, via the comments:
Commenter [+] quotes this,
Please maintain good personal hygiene out of consideration for other customers.
And adds,
Quite. And presumably every one of those bullet points – complete with its own big pink heart – tells a story about the venue’s clientele. Some incident or other. After all, you’d only need to announce this rather bizarre list of rules if you already have a significant number of customers who are enormously selfish and self-absorbed, prone to littering and violence and psychological crises, and whose personal hygiene falls far short of what one might hope.
The fact that the rules are there – printed up on every table – tells us quite a lot. More than intended, I venture. One might even infer some correlation of selfish and antisocial behaviour with the supposedly radical “identities” being professed. For instance.
Previously in the laugh-a-minute world of ostentatiously “queer” venues.
Consider this an open thread. Share ye links and whatnot.
Sad Dyke Poetry Night… gee, that sounds like such fun! A pity that I won’t be able to attend.
“Halal Certified, Boycott-Friendly, And Full Of Character.”
Not entirely unrelated: Moustachioed woman with teal hair issues instructions on your expected deference as an “ally.”
Though I somehow doubt you could hope to meet her exacting standards.
Also, “Stick up for transphobia when you see it.” Which I’m assuming was a slip of the tongue. Though, given the above, a not entirely untempting notion.
And on the subject of “allyship” and your expected compliance.
Form an orderly line. No pushing at the back.
Made from real Palestinians?
I’m noticing more and more instances where I open a link and get the ‘page doesn’t exist’ message but, using xcancel, the page presents.
Are the gremlins at Twitter/X reinstating censorship surreptitiously?
I’m still pondering the mindset of someone who wishes to visibly support a country in which people like themselves – gay people, cross-dressers, etc., – are considered anathema, a “Western” contaminant, and would face a very serious risk of incarceration, beatings, torture, public lashings, and extrajudicial killings, including beheadings.
You’d think there’d be some dissonance, some moment of hesitation.
From one of the comments:
Actually, as a man, I am quite obsessed with genitalia when choosing sexual partners. The person must be a woman and possess a natural vagina. If those conditions are not true, that is a huge problem. I am not at all embarrassed about this “obsession.”
It’s not a coffee shop run by theatre kids. It’s a podium set up by narcissists who expect to bask in the adoration of like minded people, and lecture less virtuous people.
Places like this attract the same type of people as the owners, meaning the clientele will be lecturing and badgering people who don’t live up the their lofty standards. Which will be just about everyone, because even 99% agreement isn’t enough.
It’s a magnet for immature, emotionally fragile people who react to any disagreement with tantrums and often violence.
There was a Dilbert cartoon years ago where the pointy haired boss (PHB) was interviewing a job applicant. He boasted that the company recently instituted a response team to deal with serious bodily injury issues, and it’s been so efficient that they’ve not had an incident all year.
The candidate says “Wait. That means either you had a workplace that was so screwed up that bodily injury in a software development shop was so common that you needed to have a response team in the first place, or you’re so stupid you built a response team for no possible reason”
This coffee shop is so screwed up that they have to post an 11 point list of psychotic or irrational behaviours they say they won’t tolerate. That means those 11 behaviours are so common that they feel they have to warn clientele about them.
On the one hand, it’s pitiful how pathetic these people are. On the other hand, at least if they’re all congregated together, they’re staying away from normal people and only bothering each other.
This might, just might, have something to do with the current meaning of “queer” as “violating every norm of [firstly but not exclusively] sexual behavior.”
Because “psychotic” describes them and their chosen clientele.
Maybe “queering the culture” wasn’t such a good idea after all.
Speculation: XCancel caches X pages, and there is a delay between the time when an X page is deleted and when XCancel notices and deletes it from its cache.
This might be useful to know.
As noted following this boggling incident,
Say, the kinds of personalities who wish to know, as a condition of entry, whether you have a genuine, meaningful relationship with your own hair.
Racist Waymo robotaxi snitches on innocent teens who dindu nuffin.
[ Checks state of relationship with hair. ]
Oh, and further to this, this.
Palestine Cola – A Flavor Explosion To Die For!
Rather a long winded way of saying, “I am so wack I can’t get laid”.
Our host’s idea of hell?
I suspect it would meet the criteria.
[ David’s lousy hair intensifies. ]
Current hair status: glorious.
Seems I missed fundraising week – danged work and travel.
As promised, a belated Ping! Hope this clears some of my tab; I fear it’s gotten quite large of late.
Bless you, madam. May your baps be pleasing to both touch and tongue.
[ Sets Innocent Face to maximum. ]
The Other Half is watching a YouTube video about an attempt to browse YouTube videos using a dial-up connection.
This prompted some reminiscing about one evening in 1996 spent downloading the trailer for Star Trek: First Contact. It was the size of a postcard and took 45 minutes.
It was, as I recall, terribly exciting.
“My mother made me a lesbian!”
“If I buy the yarn, will she make me one too?”
I’ll let myself out now.
Note how he/she/it dismisses being a straight “ally” as “doing the bare minimum”, implying that there is an expectation that everyone really ought to be queer.
Q: What happened to the “rainbow” shibboleth that all orientations are fine?
A: For much of the “queer” community, that was always a pretense employed tactically, as illustrated by frequently expressed contempt for “vanilla” “breeders”.
Related: Gay men who expressed disgust at the sight of female bodies and lesbians ditto regarding male bodies.
May your baps be pleasing to both touch and tongue.
Hahaha!! It’s a good thing I have a particular fondness for British murder mysteries, and have previously come across that term in one series set in the Scottish Highlands. I’ve even gone looking for recipes, but I am not sure mine would turn out quite as pleasing as those in your blessing.
“Gays for palestine”–David is wondering about the mindset–but it is easy, you see, because they are just mouthing words, slogans, to sound with it, in, hip. Slogans like “from the river to the sea” with no understanding that the phrase means genocide of the jews. Solidarity with “brown” people, with no understanding that their solidarity is one way. Imagining that all “oppressed” people are allies, without grasping that to Hamas-adjacent they are simply infidels deserving death. They just babble the approved words and do not reflect on them.
young master
THIRTY BLOODY YEARS AGO.
[ Applies moisturiser. ]
“You may fascinate a woman with a piece of cheese.”
ShoeOnHead asks, “Are these the books the Nazis burned?”
If I see a list like that in cafes my assumptions immediately go to a bossy and micromanaging staff arrangement. But yes, there have clearly been incidents with the clientele.
Tempus fugit.
Hard ‘g’.
Mine immediately go to “very bad clientele” and “very bad neighborhood”.
Shoe claims this female fascination with animal/monster porn is widespread, but I don’t know if that is strictly true. A few pundits punditing are not always reliable, although I did know a few women back in the 70’s/80’s with strong interests in rather disturbing Star Trek porn. But then, I don’t know all that much about Shoe, either, for that matter.
You are familiar with the popularity of 50 Shades of Grey? A popularity I wish I didn’t know about myself.
Heh. “I would spit on you if I saw you. Shame on you, you garbage man. Shame on you”
Absolutely is. The entire modern “urban fantasy” genre owes its existence to the Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter novel series, which turns into straight-up werewolf porn by book 4 and gets worse from there.
This isn’t even counting the popularity of sexy vampire novels going back to Anne Rice’s Interview with the Vampire.
Monster porn is just the ultimate expression of hybristophilia.
I’ll take ‘things that should go without saying’ for 400 please, Alex.
Quite. And presumably every one of those bullet points – complete with its own big pink heart – tells a story about the venue’s clientele. I mean, you’d only need to announce this rather bizarre list of rules if you already have a significant number of customers who are enormously selfish and self-absorbed, prone to littering and violence and psychological crises, and whose personal hygiene falls far short of what one might hope.
The fact that the rules are there – printed up on every table – tells you quite a lot.
One might even infer some correlation of selfish and antisocial behaviour with the “identities” being professed. For instance.
The word she is deployed.
Also, thing that never happens, etc and so forth.
It’s a politically correct sideways expression of the female desire to submit/be dominated by a man strong enough to defend/damage you… which has obviously been forced deep underground by feminism.
A similar phenom is the attraction of AWFLs to violent men of color – who are still allowed to display that violent power, even celebrated for it.
[ Post updated. ]
Oh, damn, it’s in Belfast. I was going to drop in for a cup and see how far my “addled old racist woman” shtick could go.
This obsession has been keeping the species going for eons. Or don;t they realize that?
Bye, son.