Friday Ephemera
The thrill of twins (a drama of expansion) || Anything you can do, I can do better. || An ode to preserves. || A project for the weekend. || Seattle public schools, you say. || The progressive retail experience, parts 408, 409 and 410. || Repair job, watched closely. || At last, lamps made from croissants and leftover bread. || Absurdle, adversarial Wordle. || One of these objects is not like the others. || Public-information billboards of note. || Being “anti-racist,” she doesn’t depict them. || Touchdown. || At last, lab-grown hair. || His and hers, a comparison. || Heh. || Cold sorcery. || It’s a consolation, I suppose. || Fondling scenes. || Insert finger, please. || And finally, remember, your cat is trying to kill you.
Oh, no, I ducked it all up! What punishment awaits?
Just dropped in an </i> and an </em> Steve, and it’s got me stumped too. Anyway…
“Public-information billboards of note.”
I’ve never understood the North American obsession with criminalising “jaywalking”. Crossing the street is one of the essential skills of urban life. It’s what separates us from the hicks and bumpkins.
Er. No offence meant to any rural types. You’re doing great work there with all the cows and potatoes and stuff. Keep it up.
“Man banned from Facebook for post about hatred of peas.
Indeed, the barbarians are inside the gates.”
Well, according to the subject of the latter story, hatred of peas is racist now. Good job, Facebots!
“Just going to leave this here, I think.”
It’s clearly No.4, although No.3 is pretty bad. (Just edited the #s to “No.”, ‘cos that’s another one…)
This cat does not exist. Although how you’d tell is anyone’s guess.
I’ve never understood the North American obsession with criminalising “jaywalking”.
I don’t get it either. A few years back we traveled to Montreal with a group of people to celebrate my wife’s birthday. One of the men in our group was lagging behind and had to rush to cross the street as the pedestrian light was about to change. A cop chased him down and ticketed him. If you’ve ever been to Montreal and seen the way the natives cross streets and drive, you’d be as gobsmacked as I was.
Is crazy place, this country.
Yakov Smirnoff?
The CDC has declined to collect data on co-morbidities for covid–in the UK only 2.6% of fatalities have been in those under 65 without comorbidities. Why don’t we know that in the US?
We do know.
Interestingly enough, that used to say “almost 6%”, so “over 5%” probably means 5.001%. Not that I am cynical.
Anyway, cross reference the above with sex and age, and you can get an accurate picture of the lack of carnage in the young compare to what the doomsayers claim.
Also note among the comorbidities:
IOW, shot, defenestrated, took the gas pipe, etc.
All the bad things you’ve heard about water fowl’s propensity to sh!t are true.
True of pretty much all birds, I’ve heard. So if your friend has an uncaged pet parrot you’d better watch where you sit.
Yakov Smirnoff?
No, is part of an old joke that also involves the hapless individual wanting a fork on the table, and a sheet on his bed.
Not like chickens, my experience with which has left me with a lasting loathing of the evil little dolts.
Dealt with in person – say, when Beloved Sister-In-Law asks you to keep an eye on them for a week – they’re not the most endearing creatures.
they’re not the most endearing creatures
Well, imagine how you would feel if you descended from the mighty Tyrannosaurus Rex, only to end up a walking vector for hot sauce for hairless apes…
They wuz kangz, for real real!
Oh noes!
[ Pulls on previously unnoticed bathroom-style light switch, enormous neon sign flares into life. ]
[ Resumes nonchalant wiping of bar. ]
[ Resumes nonchalant wiping of bar. ]
Whew. He must be in a good mood.
He must be in a good mood.
Heh.
Wait a minute. When am I not?
[ Peers over spectacles. ]
This cat does not exist. Although how you’d tell is anyone’s guess.
Hit refresh a few times, unless you like Chernobylesque cats.
I’ve never understood the North American obsession with criminalising “jaywalking”
Germany has a similar problem. In Hanover one evening a group of us (Brits) were soundly reprimanded by a street sweeper for crossing against a red light on a street totally empty of traffic.
Too stupid to to live.
Wait a minute. When am I not?
May I call your attention to the hamster urine, jackets on fire, and the Correction Booth?
May I call your attention to the hamster urine, jackets on fire, and the Correction Booth?
I think you’ll find that’s exuberance and jollity.
We Wuz Sikorsky
“Kenyan Gabriel Nderitu Muturi spent…running on a 40-litre Toyota engine”
40 litres is something north of 2400 cubic inches. I wonder where he got that.
Layers and layers of fact checkers couldn’t be wrong.
Layers and layers of fact checkers couldn’t be wrong.
A Napier Sabre out of a Hawker Tempest was 36.6L so I am guessing the “journalist” might be a tad confused, or, if a 40L engine couldn’t get a barn off the ground, it is a pretty pathetic engine.
Just going to leave this here, I think.
[ Peers over spectacles. ]
Ok, I’ll bite. I have heard the British pronunciation of advertisement, the metal whose chemical symbol on the periodic table is Al, and the name Anthony, but for the life of me I can’t recall hearing aristocrat or Adolf. How are those words supposed to sound, according to the Queen’s English?
How are those words supposed to sound, according to the Queen’s English?
The main trick is to remember to stick in lots of excess letters, like colour, programme, or oesophagus, and not pronounce them, then, the letters that are supposed to be pronounced like the letter “H”, or “T”, don’t pronounce them either.
Watch some BBC or ITV with the English subtitles on and you’ll get the hang of it.
What was so ironic about that essay was this gem at the end…
It is all rather like listening to a woman who is in a long-running abusive relationship acknowledging the mind-fuckery and faithlessness she’s subjected to, still followed by the inevitable, stupid, stubborn insistence that her partner is “good for me”.
…this nitwit thinking a volcano was caused by “global warming”…
My car gives off heat in the process that produces its forward or rearward motion. The sun warms us all. My car is moved by the sun.
This.
It has been observed that even among the “mostly peaceful” bonobos related females will cooperate to capture and kill the young offspring of unrelated females, even within the same troop.
How are those words supposed to sound, according to the Queen’s English?
Aristocrat
Britsh Adolph vs American Adolph.
Aha! Thanks, Steve. I suspected that might be the case for Adolph, but had no guesses for aristocrat. I always learn something when I visit here.
I LOLed at “Canadian levels of gender BS disaster“.
We’re famous for being the worst in the world at something. That’s an accomplishment. [ toasts Steve E ]
I’ve never understood the North American obsession with criminalising “jaywalking”
Tangentially, much as I love Italy, I still say a prayer every time I approach a pedestrian crossing there.
A game of chicken, every single time.
I think you’ll find that’s exuberance and jollity.
[ Glances at scars. ]
[ Glances at scars. ]
They’re jolly scars.
“Britsh Adolph”
Well, that reminds me, although it’s a month late, that Adolphus Spriggs (“the North Korean Johnnie Ray”), was the musical genius responsible for this festive masterpiece.
(Really Spike Milligan, although curiously Spriggs is credited as a writer on one episode of Murphy Brown. Obviously a pseudonym, but whose? Incidentally, for any of our colonial chums unfamiliar with the Goons, the “child” at the end of I’m Walking Backwards – Bluebottle – is Peter Sellers.)
[ toasts Steve E ]
Cheers! It took a lot of hard work to arrive where we are today. Congratulations to everyone involved. To quote John Lennon, “On behalf of the group and myself, I hope we passed the audition.”
RIP Meat Loaf
Time to rewatch Roadie. Starts like a hillbilly Beckett play, then gets weird. “Everything works if you let it.”
“British Adolph”
I have heard both pronunciations in America.
And in England “Hitler” is pronounced “Hilter”.
“Following a lawsuit from parents, the State of California has permanently removed the ‘In Lak Ech Affirmation’ from the state curriculum, which would have forced students to chant to the Aztec god of human sacrifice in order to become ‘warriors’ for ‘social justice.’ ”
I have heard rumors that some public school teachers and administrators are not evil. Only rumors, though.
Schroedinger’s ACLU: You cannot know if government transparency is good or bad until you know what serves the Left.
which would have forced students to chant to the Aztec god of human sacrifice in order to become ‘warriors’ for ‘social justice.’
If social justice truly existed those who supported and still support this action would make the ultimate sacrifice and put themselves forward for human sacrifice. Crickets…I thought so.
I have heard both pronunciations in America.
When I’ve heard the short “a” pronunciation in the US it still drops the “l” sound as it does with the long “a” pronunciation, whereas the British sound out the “l”. So the US is “ăd ŏf” and the British is “ăd ŏlf”. Of course, there are probably many varied pronunciations across the regions.
And in England “Hitler” is pronounced “Hilter”
Or, rather more commonly, “Itluh” (with regional variations on the pronunciation of “I”)
That’s funny, I thought in America the left pronounced Hitler “Trump”.
The erasure of women and girls continues apace.
Holy frijoles, what the hell has happened to Canada?
Caution: probably SFW (maybe) but keep the mind bleach handy.
https://twitter.com/dadd638/status/1463215705059434506
Holy frijoles, what the hell has happened to Canada?
Our institutions here have long been infiltrated by the left. Our judges are appointed so can act with impunity. Our Charter of Rights was written on swiss cheese–it has so many holes in it. As a result, our courts have started acting like the appointed Provincial Human Rights Commissions (which are jokes). The media received a $500-million dollar payout from the leftie liberals and just prior to last year’s election received another $50-million so there is no negative coverage in the main stream media.
Because of the way electoral districts are distributed center-left parties (far left by American standards) can form a majority government with slightly more than a third of the popular vote and rule as if they have a majority mandate. Our current government holds a minority position with 160 of 338 seats with 32.6% of the popular vote while the conservative official opposition took 119 of 338 seats with 33.7% of the vote. Adding insult to injury, the Bloc Quebecois (a party dedicated to separating from Canada) holds 32 seats with 7.6% of the vote while the loony left NDP have 25 seats with 17.8% of the vote.
What happened to Canada you ask? It’s SNAFU–Situation Normal All F**ked Up.
Something we just learned about from experience this evening. This has apparently been going on for years and not just in South Florida.
[ Peers over spectacles. ]
[ Feels nonplussed ]
Because I had to.
Our institutions here have long been infiltrated by the left
Mark Steyn started referring to Canada as a banana republic some time ago; it’s neither a joke nor hyperbole. Our farthest-right party would be considered moderate Democrat in the US, true, but there’s as much kleptocracy as political ideology driving Canadian government.
If you want to argue that kleptocracy is also characteristic of leftism, I wouldn’t disagree.
can form a majority government with slightly more than a third of the popular vote
When Canadians get smug about US politics I like to point out that the Founding Fathers were not exactly unfamiliar with the concept of a Westminster parliamentary system, and explicitly rejected it as an option.
A psychology student? How surprising.
Not.
And in England “Hitler” is pronounced “Hilter”
Source here.
I never knew that a by-election in North Minehead could be so interesting.
A psychology student? How surprising.
But remember that English and Education departments are also full of deranged and evil leftists. From the link:
“A petition on Change.org identified Darling as a St. Francis College student, where she is listed as studying psychology as well as education and English.”
The World Economic Forum ponders the inexplicable mystery of why we don’t want to eat bugs, live in a pod, and own nothing:
“At Davos, a few years ago, the Edelman [Trust] Survey showed us that the good news is that the elite across the world trust each other more and more. So we can come together and design and do beautiful things together. The bad news is that in every single country they were polling the majority of people trusted that elite less. So, we can lead but…”
I’d love to see a link to the full talk, even better with a transcript and the name of the speaker.
There will never be a shortage of stoned, stupid leftists.
You can find that imbecile poster, without the added capitalist commentary, all over the internet.
South Park covered this:
Man 2: Right now we’re proving we don’t need corporations. We don’t need money. This can become a commune where everyone just helps each other.
Man 1: Yeah, we’ll have one guy who like, who like, makes bread. A-and one guy who like, l-looks out for other people’s safety.
Stan: You mean like a baker and a cop?
Man 2: No no, can’t you imagine a place where people live together and like, provide services for each other in exchange for their services?
Kyle: Yeah, it’s called a town.
Driver: You kids just haven’t been to college yet. But just you wait, this thing is about to get HUGE.
Holy frijoles, what the hell has happened to Canada?
I used to litigate divorces in California and I can imagine that also occurring there. I recall when I started seeing some judges coming down hard on parents in custody cases because they were – heavens! – smokers. Then the check boxes started appearing on judicial forms. By that, I mean state approved forms where a judge could just tick off boxes to rule what parents could and could not do in the presence of children and the use of tobacco became one of them. I suspect those forms have gotten longer since I left Cali and the check boxes more numerous.
Maybe the California judiciary could simply have one box: “Parent shall not engage in wrongthink in the presence of the child nor allow the child to remain in the presence of any third people similarly engaged in wrongthink.” More efficient and allows for shifting definitions of wrongthink.
I am so much happier photographing weddings now. I mean, there’s cake, I never got cake when I went to court.