New Realms Of Pleasure

I think it’s fair to say Ms Bloom isn’t a gifted lyricist, or vocalist. Or a natural dancer.

Does someone have the brain bleach handy?

The awkward hugs from bow-tie man at the end were quite something.
Some of Bloom’s songs from ‘Crazy Ex Girlfriend’ are quite fun.

Kill it with fire.
But her sex junk is so oh, oh, oh.

I think the word is unconvincing. Or if two words are allowed, conceptual nightmare.

I realize that I am not a registered ob/gyn or anything, but I cannot help but think that if one’s vagina consistently makes noises consonant with human speech that one ought to get that looked at.
By medical professional, I mean. Not a paying audience.

DON’T WATCH. IT’S A TRAP!
Why didn’t I listen?

I managed 31 seconds. Awful.

Next week: “My testicles can sing.”

I am teaching mine to knit.

Wow!
Thank you Dicentra and David. What would I have done if I hadn’t seen that.
My life would have been poorer. I feel even further enriched than the EU wants me to be.

May Messrs Bloom and Nye reap all the accolades they deserve for this.
And I’ve no idea what ‘schmear’ might be, but I can’t say I’m planning to knock myself out searching for it in Sainsbury’s.

but I cannot help but think that if one’s vagina consistently makes noises consonant with human speech that one ought to get that looked at.
By an exorcist.

I am teaching mine to knit.
Perhaps you could teach them to do make-up like this enterprising young gentleman (a ‘blender’ is simply one of those make-up sponges before anyone starts cringing):
https://www.buzzfeed.com/krishrach/a-girl-used-her-boyfriends-balls-as-a-beauty-blender-and

I’m also quite enjoying some of the twattery:

Watching this Bill Nye show is amazing. I can actually feel myself turning into a shitty JRPG villain with no motive beyond destruction.

20 seconds in and I got on my knees and prayed for the Sweet Meteor of Death
I’m pretty much the earth is a 6,000 year old bowl on the back of a dancing turtle after this
I held the monkey’s paw in my hand. I wanted this wish. I needed it. “Bring back Bill Nye”, I said.

Bill Nye was in the same building as this? He -announced- it?
But Bill O’Reilly must be destroyed, right? No evidence, we’re just supposed to -believe-.
The shark-jumping thing has been happening a lot more often the last few years. Lately it has been every day. Today’s shark jump brought to you by Bill Nye and the letter C.

The long-dead guy with the sandwich sign was right after all.
The end is Nye.

Pointing and laughing aside, I think intellectual integrity compels me to do at least a nominal analysis of what, specifically, is wrong here.
Let’s dispense with bad production values, literalist interpretations of statements like “my vagina has a voice”, and hand-wavey factors such as ‘cringeworthy’. These are cheap targets. I should look for a bigger fish, not just giggle at the funny foreigner.
And I think the big fish here is something like intellectual fraud, or perhaps impersonation. It’s a distinct, nutty ideology masquerading as non-ideological Reason Itself, spending unsustainably from Reason’s metaphorical credit and Science Guy’s reputation.

I simply remember my
Vagina can sing
And then I don’t feel so bad.
Thanks for that. Now I have a mental image of an alternative version of the Mother Superior singing “Climb Every Mountain.”
Related.

But can her vagina talk without moving its lips, a kind of ventriloquist vagina?
Sometimes I lie awake at night wondering about these things.

“My vagina has a voice!”
Rachel finally heard from her parasitic twin.

Kill it with fire.
But her sex junk is so oh, oh, oh.
Where is Monty Python’s giant foot? There must be a giant foot.

Next week: “My testicles can sing.”

♫Everybody do the Michigan Raaagg! Everybody likes the Michigan Raaaagg!
Every Mame, and Jane, and Ruth, from Weehawken to Duluth!
Slide, ride, glide the Michigan
Stomp, romp, pomp the Michigan
Jump, clump, pump the Michigan Raaaag!
♫

I cannot help but think that if one’s vagina consistently makes noises consonant with human speech that one ought to get that looked at.

It depends on whether the noises are echoes of human speech occurring outside. Echoes would indicate a whole different set of problems. The sounds of the sea when held up to the ear: no problem at all. Probably.

Is it “anti-science” of me to question this?

Yes, it is, Eagle. Also, the mocking of this talented, strong, woke, modern woman betrays how misogynistic and hateful everybody here is and explains why we all deserve pre-emptive face-punching from the non-violent, thoughtful and caring people who support everything Progressive.

Pointing and laughing aside, I think intellectual integrity compels me to do at least a nominal analysis of what, specifically, is wrong here.
That way lies madness. It’s singing vaginas all the way down.