The Amazon Vanguard
An agony of sorts, spotted by Julia and several others during the National Union of Students’ currently ongoing Women’s Conference:
No, you mustn’t laugh, says the Independent’s Andrew Griffin. Because clapping in support can break a woman in half:
And what could possibly be funny about a room full of “mindful” feminists doing jazz hands every few minutes?
Evidence is triggering too, apparently. And so it goes in the bin:
Says the “struggling postgraduate” and NUS Women’s Officer whose interests include cats, “trade unions” and “being mentally ill.”
After quite a bit of sniggering, chiefly from other women, the fearless warriors, our architects of tomorrow, withdrew from public view to a more private Twitter account. What with all that heteronormative persecution. You see, strong feminist women need a “self-care room” and “safe spaces” where heathens who find this level of preciousness amusing are just a traumatic memory. Shielded from the horrors of raised eyebrows and any hint of incredulity, the ladies continued to address the great issues of the day.
And so in the official Women’s Conference document we find such things as this:
The appropriation of Black women by white gay men is prevalent within the LGBT scene and community. This may be manifested in the emulation of the mannerisms, language (particularly AAVE- African American Vernacular English) and phrases that can be attributed to Black women. White gay men may often assert that they are “strong black women” or have an “inner black woman.” White gay men are the dominant demographic within the LGBT community, and they benefit from both white privilege and male privilege.
And therefore,
This type of appropriation is unacceptable and must be addressed. Low numbers of Black LGBT women delegates attend NUS LGBT conference. This can be attributed to many factors, one of which may be the prevalent appropriation by white gay men, which may mean that delegates do not feel comfortable or safe attending conference.
You see, if a black woman has something better to do with her time – better than doing jazz hands whenever a feminist speaks – this is almost certainly the fault of white gay men. All of whom are doing ghetto fabulous finger-snaps and referring to themselves, continually, as “strong black women.”
Oh look. A button.
‘She told him to “stop taking the piss out of fucking disability,” claiming that “it’s an access need and it’s fucking sign language.” The sly implication being that her male friend was mocking deaf people, which, from the context, he obviously wasn’t’.
So deaf people can’t actually see other folks clapping them?
That’s news to me.
What’s the sound of one jazz hand?
What’s the sound of one jazz hand?
This:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIzAWOnHWZA#t=85
Meanwhile, at another reputable seat of learning….
https://twitter.com/Vazza_d/status/581063216022814720
Meanwhile, at another reputable seat of learning….
I don’t have much of a view on gender neutral bathrooms in universities, but I did notice the incompetent spelling.
Very slightly on topic but I was at a performance of Madama Butterfly at the ROH on Monday which was advertised as having a simultaneous sign language interpretation. Sure enough, on the left of the stage during the performance was an elegantly dressed young woman giving an expert – as far as I could tell – sign language interpretation.
Of course, since the opera was performed in Italian there was, above the stage, an area where English surtitles were projected.
We discussed this during the interval and came to the conclusion that it must tick some ‘accessability’ box in some government grant application. Either that, or the sign language was in Italian and any hearing impaired italians in the audience could understand what Cio Cio San was singing about.
As an aside, Puccini, the composer of Madama Butterfly, was very fond of percussion and his operas often require more percussion than can fit in the orchestra pit, so in order to cater to this demand one of the boxes was taken over by a percussionist who banged on his big bass drum and clashed his very large cymbals repeatedly throughout the performance. Right next to the young lady doing the sign language translation. I do hope her hearing wasn’;t damaged.
I was at a performance of Madama Butterfly at the ROH on Monday
And they say this place is a den of ne’er-do-wells.
“The Amazon Vanguard”
Ironically, the “vanguard” are the foremost parts of a military formation–the pointy tip of the spear, so to speak. It is amusing to think of such fainting violets as a vanguard.
Having scanned quite a few of Aisling’s tweets and pronouncements, it’s how she seems to operate – as a dishonest little scold.
Fortunately I don’t deal with this exact manifestation in my work life. However, increasingly I see more of the similar behavior in a work context. Especially as I am now working closer to government agencies. Increasingly I find it difficult to be in a position of needing to get/give information from/to someone who is a woman. Given past drama blow-ups over some rather simple tasks/requests (there was a specific incident regarding the simple delivery of a fingerprint card that was downright Monty-Pythonesque), I have developed anxiety problems. Given past experience with marriage counselors (yes I droned on whinely about this already) and spending considerable time “understanding” how people who don’t have jobs dependent upon objective tasks think, well this is only becoming double-plus ungood. What I’m beginning to believe is that civil society can only remain civil for so long. Eventually, once enough people are required to spend enough time walking on eggshells around the special snowflakes, something is going to give.
My wife (a physician) was upbraided in a meeting by an NHS manager who found the fact that my wife was shaking her head at the ludicrous claims she was making “offensive”.
Shaking your head in silent disagreement is now “offensive”.
We’re doomed.
“WHY WON’T YOU JUST LET ME WIN?!”
That.
I mean, oh my God that.
Also this, which fairly blew my mind, though it does seem to explain rather a lot and gives at least one pertinent answer to the question raised above (emphasis added):
Innocent until proven guilty is a silencing tactic in which it is argued that any harmful action that did not result in a criminal conviction must not result in any repercussions to the person who did the action, often to the point where it is insisted that they are entitled to have everyone believe that the action did not take place at all, let alone censure them in any way for it.
It is based on the same principle that is held central in many legal systems.
Problems with this stance include ….
Feel free to find out what problems innocent until proven guilty causes to Feminism here.
Well Dr. C, let me (re-)tell of a diversity training class I was in 20 years ago. It was one BS urban legend after another being told to us. I was squirming a bit in my chair and rolled my eyes a few times as I tried to contain myself. The “teacher” of the class, a small black woman who quite obviously had less experience with the wide diversity of cultures than I did, came after me and lectured me in front of all my coworkers as they were filing past going back to work. I tried to relate this PC-is-getting-out-of-control concern to my doctor during my physical the next day. He, a conservative Presbyterian, told me it was concerning that I took such things seriously. We should just laugh them off. Part of me empathizes with your wife but the occupation-ist in me feels a certain schadenfreude. We were doomed years ago.
Aren’t the suggested silent alternatives to clapping deeply discriminating against those who are visually impaired.
Imagine a blind speaker getting no feedback. Could be utterly demoralizing.
Speaking of ne’er=do-wells, the premiere of Madama Butterfly at La Scala, Milan was received less than enthusiastically by large sections of the audience and Puccini was forced to conclude that his rivals had seeded the audience with malcontents who sought to belittle his acheivement.
And in case you thought that that sort of behavior by opera fans was a thing of the past, last year the premiere of a new production of Mozart’s Idomeneo at the ROH was roundly booed.
Which brings us to the point. What is the jazz-hands equivalent of booing if, say, a speaker inadvertantly says coloured instead of black or African American or whatever the correct terminology is this week?
Does one extend the middle finger at the speaker or wave a fist? Or is the good old fashioned tearing limb from limb still the prefered reaction.
Aren’t the suggested silent alternatives to clapping deeply discriminating against those who are visually impaired?
Heh. You’re thinking much too rationally. We’re talking about people who choose to spend their time at a conference voting for the following: Abolishing prison in the name of feminism; the “right” of students to more “free” stuff (specifically, leaving taxpayers the bill for that worthless Gender Studies degree); the inevitable boilerplate about Palestine; and the aforementioned claim that gay white men are oppressing black women by “appropriating” their ghetto fabulous finger-snaps.
An NUS Women’s Conference is not an ideal place to find people with a sense of either proportion or realism. Borderline personalities, yes. Future cat ladies, yes. Realism, no.
“The Amazon Vanguard”
Ironically, the “vanguard” are the foremost parts of a military formation–the pointy tip of the spear, so to speak. It is amusing to think of such fainting violets as a vanguard.
Normally yes, but in this instance this vanguard may simply be the security detail for the large, box shaped truck. If so, they can have a van with lovely air conditioning, a nice selection of tea, more than enough room for couches to recline upon, and it’s mobile as well . . .
Future cat ladies, yes.
But, also…
Future politicians, yes.
Future BBC and Guardian journalists, yes.
Future heads of departments at Universities, yes.
Future teachers, social workers, NGO leaders etc…, yes.
Future BBC and Guardian journalists, yes.
Those too. Though I suspect there’s some overlap with the unhappy cat ladies.
For such a tough minded crusaders they have the toughness of a piece of wet tissue paper.
At times like these, I fund it helpful to remember Disraeli’s definition of diplomacy.
or possibly Will Rogers. There seems to be some controversy.
I heard it was Bismark.
“For such a tough minded crusaders they have the toughness of a piece of wet tissue paper.”
Tough on clapping. Tough on the causes of clapping.
A NUS Conference indeed.
‘Please be mindful’.
It’s like being in the world of ‘Demolition Man’. Only without the prospect of meeting Lenina Huxley.
Jazz hands are ableist and racist against people who don’t have hands, such as Captain Hook.
Poor Captain Hook. Not only is he a disabled man trying to run a small business in the teeth of continual harassment by juvenile delinquents, but if he tried to applaud the NUS Wimmins Conference in the manner they request, people would think he was waving.
Zippgun – Are these some of the people who get ever so cross (righteously) that women aren’t allowed to take front line combat roles in the Army?
I think we could use a regiment of Jazz Handing feminist scolds! Think of the confusion in the enemy’s ranks when the Royal Regiment of Al Jolson marches into view, waggling their digits disapprovingly.
Their regimental motto could be Reprehendo tuum privilegium. Their cap badge a mailed fist defiantly gripping an iPhone. Their regimental march would be “Female Of The Species” (if the word “female” isn’t too triggering).
A civlised administration would provide adult diapers, crying towels, and fainting couches.
As if you could get out ahead of these people with mere parody.
David – titter. According to Conference Motion 512
What a wonderful conference agenda!
Reading it, I felt a little bit like Wendy in ‘The Shining’, when she discovered Jack had been typing “ALL WORK AND NO PLAY MAKES JACK A DULL BOY” over and over again.
But in a good way.
I’m just a man, but I have some suggestions for our female supremacist jazz handers:
* “Bell Hooks” should read “bell hooks”. Even I know that. Tsk!
* “Free education would pay for itself. Research shows that for every £1 invested in higher education the economy expands by £2.60.”
“Research”, eh? 🙂 We should shut down all businesses forthwith, and send everybody to university. We’ll all be rich! Rich as Nazis!
* “Everyone should be provided with enough money to live off comfortably – with the ability to afford housing, feed oneself and dependents, buy clothes, afford fuel to heat one’s home and cook, public transport, internet access, a mobile phone and leisure services such as libraries and swimming pools.”
And a pony!
* “Palestinian students’ right to education continues to suffer as a result of the illegal occupation of the West Bank and Israel’s brutal siege on Gaza.”
PAY NO ATTENTION TO THAT BEARDED MAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN!
* “To call for the abolition of the prison-industrial complex.”
LET THOSE RAPISTS GO!
* “Closed spaces for liberation groups are extremely important.”
This one might read like a motion from Pyongyang, but it came from the Oxford University Students Union. Won’t somebody think of the poor Oxford students, fighting for liberation? 🙁
* “The use of the term “sisters” is exclusionary of some women”
Oh?
* “There are more than two genders and we should always recognise this.”
Masculine, feminine, and… miscellaneous?
* “Misgendering someone is an act of violence.”
It’s literally like kicking someone in the nads, or lady-nads.
* “NUS Womens’ campaign should be monitoring the number of trans students who attend events.”
“Excuse me, er, madam, but I notice your rather pronounced Adam’s Apple…”
* “To amend the NUS Zero Tolerance Statement policy to cover all NUS events and conferences; and to encourage Unions to ban clubs and societies from holding events which permit or encourage (cisgender) members to use ‘cross-dressing’ as a mode of fancy dress.”
First, they came for the drag queens…
* ““Women’s sanitary products” are a necessity for those who menstruate, most of whom are women, and should be treated as such.”
Because men sometimes menstruate.
* “Huge numbers of women suffer from homelessness or insecure housing – this is bad.”
Jazz hands!
* “There has been a constant attack on black women’s blackness for centuries.”
Stop attacking black women’s blackness! This is bad!
Cracking up over here, Steve 2! Oh, the pain….
The omission of a pony is the red flag, here.
I cannot and WILL NOT support any movement that fails to promise — much less provide — a pony.
Can I just go completely OT, and probably break the blog rules, to congratulate Quint&Jessel, Sea of Azof, on her nic? Very cute – the James version, or the Britten?
jazz hands news
Until The Whole World Hears
Ah, Steve . . .
. . . feed oneself and dependents . . .
That is where the free pony comes in. If there are a lot of dependents, one moves up to a Percheron, and if there is just the one student, one moves down to a Great Dane or a St Bernard.
. . . the inevitable boilerplate about Palestine . . .
FREE PALESTINE!!!!!
With any purchase of Jordan and Syria!!!!!
—Hurry now, offer good only while supplies last!!!
“Huge numbers of women suffer from homelessness or insecure housing – this is bad.”
Oh, in California, it’s not just women . . . .
“FREE PALESTINE!!!!!
With any purchase of Jordan and Syria!!!!!
—Hurry now, offer good only while supplies last!!!”
Regrettably, however, one might have to evict some extremely unpleasant tenants. You know, the sort that would have some rather harsh prescriptions for the wimmin at the NUS conference.
* “To call for the abolition of the prison-industrial complex.”
LET THOSE RAPISTS GO!
Well, quite.
And remember, the people who can spend their days listening to such bollocks, the ones who expect to be given everything for free, i.e., at your expense, the ones who want to abolish prisons and set vermin loose among us, these are in no way, no way at all, “the ruling class.”
They just want to be in charge of everything. Especially your earnings.
“Misgendering someone is an act of violence.”
An do the victims of such violence find it more or less traumatic than clapping?
By the way, the feminist jazz-handers are claiming victory over the “trolls,” by which they seem to mean, anyone who even raised an eyebrow at their precious little dramas. The author of the piece, Aliya Yule, an undergraduate at Wadham College, Laurie Penny’s old stomping ground, nonetheless denounces the “all too common derailing of feminism and women’s activism.” You see, their righteousness was being “derailed” by people noticing what they were saying.
Ms Yule goes on to repeat her belief that “prison abolition is a feminist issue,” i.e., a feminist goal, and then, inevitably, she insists that someone else should pay for her degree. Though, frankly, it’s hard to see how anyone else is benefitting from her continued education.
the feminist jazz-handers are claiming victory over the “trolls,”
‘Some mean people laughed at us for being stupid. So we went on being stupid.’
Yay. Victory.
‘Some mean people laughed at us for being stupid. So we went on being stupid.’
Pretty much. It bodes well for the future.
Though, frankly, it’s hard to see how anyone else is benefitting from her continued “education”.
There, fixed that for you.
Epic mocking on Twitter: https://twitter.com/NUSWomen via Tim Blair
Real Racism
http://www.independent.co.uk/student/istudents/white-men-should-never-hold-elected-positions-in-british-universities-again-10138945.html
Real Racism
The anonymous student author imagines that “people don’t give a toss about their student unions” because they’re “too stunted by white men.” I suspect the chief repellent is the fact that student union politics attracts so many people who are eerily like the author. This, though, was funny, albeit inadvertently: “You’re at university, go and ask a humanities professor. Learn something.”
“You’re at university, go and ask a humanities professor. Learn something.”
Just don’t ask anything like “How does one tie shoelaces?” or “How should I cross the road safely?”
“You’re at university, go and ask a humanities professor. Learn something.”
And then radically repeat whatever you’ve been told.
Jazz hands? Isn’t that like, racist?
Attention all critics of Hillary Clinton. If you refer to her as “secretive” or “polarising,” that’s sexist. You must not notice the reality of who she is, this chronically disingenuous, morally despicable crone.
You Monster! That YouTube video on Jazz Hands that you linked to contains clapping and there was NO TRIGGER ALERT (aplogies to those sensitive souls who are traumatised by capital letters.
I’m off to create a conceptual art piece on this debacle.It involves me snoozing in a comfy arm chair* instead of taking the dog for a long walk.
* Apologies to the differently enabled. This should read “chair with padded protrusions in a vertical plane on which any available appendages may be rested in a non-racist, sexist and accepting manner.”