This Just In

It’s a steep learning curve.

Now he knows what it’s like being married.
This is where someone sends a screengrab to your beloved (and presumably long-suffering) wife.

And the headline is totally true.

David –
Long-suffering, you say?
Jane Gerving, from Hatfield, said: “I’ll miss living with the funniest man in the universe. He’s just so very fucking funny. All the time.”
http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/?p=1886&print=1

instant mashed potato
Three words I’d hoped to forget. I’m faintly surprised they still make the stuff.

What a cunt!
Ok, I’m getting my coat.

I knew German women are tough but I didn’t know they were that big.

I’m still fascinated with the Giant Stone Vulva, also known as The Vagina Megalith.
Is sexy spelunking a thing?
Is there a giant granite penis, or would that be too #rockculture?
Is this a life sized recreation of Frau Merkel’s biber?
But mainly, I wonder what went through the minds of the University of Tubingen staff when they were deciding whether to, um, erect a gargantuan cha-cha.
Was it a choice between that and a compressed pile of garbage?
There was a time when Germany was a serious nation. They used to build things like this:
http://www.atravelbook.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/Brandenburg-Gate.jpg
Now it looks like they’re inspired by the Morlocks from “The Time Machine”. Or by the primitive fertility symbols of cavemen. At least the cavemen were sincere.
I heard once that the Germans played waltzes on the radio in a desperate attempt to discourage Allied bombers from flattening their cities. As if to say “we are a civilised people, this is our music, would you reduce all this to ash and rubble?”.
I’m pretty sure that story isn’t true, but it’s an intriguing idea. What would modern Germany, or the modern West in general, offer up as a sign of its cultural worth?
Would we beam up pictures of stone lady parts and unmade beds strewn with soiled prophylactics? Would we ask that the Gotterdamerung pass over us because we adorned our lintels with vaginal knitting?

David,
Three words I’d hoped to forget. I’m faintly surprised they still make the stuff.
If there’s a market, they’ll make it. There will always be lazy bastard bachelors.

Steve,
There was a time when Germany was a serious nation.
I showed the article and photo to my lovely German wife. her response?
“The Swabians are more than a little strange.”

I thought Beaver traps were only in Canada…

If he is a Christian, is he a born-again one?

I realise I may be a tad picky about what constitutes ‘art’, but who would choose to have a giant stone fanny on the sidewalk? And, er, why?

“who would choose to have a giant stone fanny on the sidewalk?”
Just wait until next year, when, in order to demonstrate their support for gay rights, the Good Burghers purchase a giant sculpture of a man’s anus.

I clicked on the link for the tag “Giant Stone Vaginas”, hoping for more exciting stories of a similar genre.
Just the one, so far.

“There was a time when Germany was a serious nation. They used to build things like this:”
The Problem was, though, that they were also a little bit ‘Invadey’ and got the shit beaten out of them. Now they may not produce much worthwhile art but they don’t tend to get their Cities reduced to dust quite so often either.