Friday Ephemera
When trees fight back. // Every kid wants Batman teeth. // Vibrating constipation pills. // Blood worm. // Crows and coat hangers, the great mystery of our time. // Perfect shots. // Portable swing. // A tempting offer. You go first. // At last, scorpion pizza. // The fire makes it go faster, right? // Max and Ralphee. // Fermented herring explosions last for six hours. // Lava meets surf. // Lost cities found by satellites. // Synopsis of note. // All of Bach, performed weekly. // A guide to rappers’ vocabulary. // The jogger’s bell. // Brothers. // They call them knobs. // Math or maths? // Minimal tweeting. // Made of sand. // This is one of these. (h/t, PootBlog) // And finally, a live feed from orbit. Can you see your house yet?
“Fermented herring explosions last for six hours”
Headline at link: “Fermented herring explosion causes a stink”
Poor headline writer: That was the only headline possible; any other would have aroused the masses.
Vibrating constipation pills.
It’s a brave new world. I bet they didn’t have those on Star Trek.
“Max and Ralphee. “
Awwwww…..
“At last, scorpion pizza.”
Don’t tell me THAT’S halal too!
A tempting offer. You go first.
Guild of Evil recruitment centre?
Guild of Evil recruitment centre?
Oh dear me, no. The Guild of Evil’s recruitment methods are much more civilised.
The jogger’s bell.
Is the real reason for the brass in the bell so that it can double as a knuckle-duster in an emergency?
I suspect liberal use of such an accessory is likely to coincide with a massive upswing in the number of ’emergencies’.
Dinging that tiny little bell as if one had a greater claim than the hoi-polloi on the crowded pavements of the small yet densely populated UK town where I live would be only marginally less successful as an incitement to a bout of open-air fisticuffs than such well-seasoned classics as ‘What the f**k are you lookin’ at?’, ‘Are you lookin’ at our lass?’ or ‘Oi! C**T!’
Blood worm.
KILL IT WITH FIRE!
Vibrating constipation pills.
This is why the first blog I read on Fridays is this one.
Made of sand.
Nobody sneeze.
Dinner party wine bottle calculator.
I can’t help thinking that 11 hours of Tibetan bowls-inspired meditation is overdoing it maybe just a little bit.
After, say, 2 or 3 hours one might feel one was relaxed enough, that will about do for the time being.
Might even be feeling a little peckish by that stage, I don’t know.
Blood worm.
For once, the YouTube comments were worth reading. Hilarious.
Re: This is one of these,
Spike Milligan recalled a lecture he and his fellow Service artistes were given on VD before entering Austria for the first time:
” The Medical Orderly activated the projector and as the M.O spoke, we were subjected to a series of slides of mens genitals all in various stages of VD, from a small spot to a great red hanging blob. These were accompanied by cries of ” Hard luck mate” and ” Stick to wanking”. It took about twenty minutes and then we were driven back to the Hotel.”