Friday Ephemera
Meme history. Do scroll down. || Mapping hell. || Where Canadians live. || On the relativistic addition of velocity. And yes, there will be a test. || Oh dear, bad luck. || Barbed wire telephony. || Today’s word is inadvisable. || Time-lapsing Everest. || Windy valley. || “Roads designed by men are killing women,” says the Guardian. || Small, portable gardens. || Good deed. || “Fantastic Forty.” || First Man. || How to run on all fours. Because apparently it’s a thing now. || Free scarf, small catch. || What’s inside a cat? || “It’s precisely the sort of danger that people who are really looking for trouble would push.” || A niche enthusiasm. || Signage of note. (h/t, Obo) || And finally, informatively, how to bake potatoes.
Bad driving of note. Do make sure to watch it with the sound on:
https://twitter.com/ODOT_Statewide/status/1004097723346415617
Damn, we’ve both posted the exact same thing. Pass me the Stool of Shame: I’ll go and sit on it in the corner.
“Roads designed by men are killing women,” says the Guardian.
“Xavier Brice, at Sustrans, believes city planners are to blame. “Fifty-one per cent of the UK population is female, yet most of our cities are failing to design roads and streets for women to cycle,” he says. It cannot help that women remain under-represented among the transport planners and engineers who design our streets. And most council leaders, who decide how to spend the transport budget, are men.”
How exactly would roads designed by/for women differ from roads designed by/for men???
Today’s word is inadvisable: that was filmed in Clumbus. Ahia, where I used to live. Now you know why I moved.
Before I go to bed, let me try to redeem myself. Here’s why all sitcoms look the same:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQvjD2-p98U
Roads designed by women would be skinnier and the lines would be a soothing pink instead of that glaring yellow that flatters no one. And all roads would begin and end at a shoe store. 👠
Meme history. Do scroll down.
Damn, I’ve been trying to find this since the “Charlie Chaplin, Inventor of Memes” image was posted
herein the Instapundit comments the other day.champ: “How exactly would roads designed by/for women differ from roads designed by/for men???”
*sharp intake of breath* Oooh, you’ve done it now!
*sharp intake of breath* Oooh, you’ve done it now!
I mean, men tend to be a bit taller and bulkier than women (if I’m allowed to say that [cringes]). so what would entail to women designing/building roads? Narrower roads?
Narrower roads?
And by this broad’s interpretation, make them safer for women cyclists?
broads
Oopps, naughty word, I’ll report to the shaming booth forthwith!
Two martinis in and I can’t get more that a couple minutes into the velocity video – I’m hearing blah blah death pelt blah blah
It might be the martinis, but I don’t think so.
Where Canadians live
Over a third of us live in just three cities.
Fantastic Forty
The Incredibles franchise seems to increasingly be about Brad Bird working out his insecurities about his career choices on screen.
Oh dear, bad luck.
Moral of story: shoot carjackers.
No major plot-spoilers with the First Man trailer thank God.
Did he make it back? That kind of thing.
Barbed wire telephony.
An Indian wants his son to have it better than him, so he sends the son away to trade school. The kid comes back after finishing electrician’s training.
The father takes him to the chief and is bragging about how smart his son is. The chief says to the kid “Look, every time I gotta take a shit at night in my outhouse, I can’t read because it’s too dark unless the moon is out. Is there any chance you could put electricity and lights in the outhouse?”
The young Indian replies, “sure thing, Chief,” and he does as asked.
Thus, he became the first Indian to wire a head for a reservation.
Did he make it back? That kind of thing.
Friends of mine asked me how the McKellen Richard III was. My answer was, basically, Um, I don’t want to ruin the ending for you…
Moral of story: shoot carjackers.
It is rather ironic that a felon who’s prepared to terrify random people, to threaten their lives and slash them with a knife, then begs not to be repaid in suitable fashion. And indulging this double standard does no favours to other victims. Because, as above, there will be other victims.
She will not be silenced. Or informed.
Also this. I’ve spent the last few weeks clicking away four, five, even six goddamn boxes before being able to read a site’s content.
For a second there I thought that ‘First Man’ trailer might have been a trailer for a movie of the H. G. Wells book. A pity it wasn’t, actually, because ‘First Men in the Moon’ was a fine book and would make a nice steampunk-style movie now, in the hands of the right director.
Slam poetry of note.
Narrow broad roads causes a kernel panic in my brain.
“Roads designed by men are killing women,” says the Guardian.
Women are just as good as men at everything and don’t you suggest otherwise.
But women are also totally incapable of surviving if roads aren’t designed by another woman despite men and women being the same.
[stage whisper] The password is, doublethink [/stage whisper]
Ryan Gosling as Neil Armstrong ?
Next up, Woody Allen as Patton.
Regarding the niche enthusiasm, I briefly perused the comments and, sure enough, trans-sexualism is “different” because…reasons.
Ryan Gosling as Neil Armstrong?
To paraphrase The Other Half, “I don’t believe that Ryan Gosling is an actor, let alone that he’s Neil Armstrong.”
See also, Jennifer Lawrence.
I don’t believe that Ryan Gosling is Jennifer Lawrence.
Next up, Woody Allen as Patton.
Woody Allen as a 12-year-old girl
I don’t believe that Ryan Gosling is Jennifer Lawrence.
I’d believe he was Jennifer Lawrence before Armstrong.
“She will not be silenced”
It’s becoming clearer and clearer that all the left’s insults – racist, sexist, homophobic, Cuthbert, Dibble and Grubb – are just insults. There’s so sense saying “You can’t call Jordan Peterson an incel because he has a wife and children”, because they’re throwing these words about with about as much attention to their meanings as Captain Haddock calling people “bashi-bazouks”. All it means is “bad man!”
(The bashi-bazouks were irregular soldiers of the Ottoman Empire, apparently.)
re: On the relativistic addition of velocity. And yes, there will be a test.
Yeah, well Einstein was racist, dude. So that relativity theory stuff is bunk.
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/world/travel-diaries-reveal-einstein-s-racist-views-n882931?cid=sm_npd_nn_tw_nw
Where I got my map of Hell from:
http://forgottenrealms.wikia.com/wiki/Nine_Hells
I’d believe he was Jennifer Lawrence before Armstrong.
In the handful of films I’ve seen featuring Ms Lawrence, her performances have been, at best, unremarkable. And as Mystique in the X-Men films, she’s utterly dull and unconvincing, even by the standards of her peers.
“She will not be silenced”
To be fair, it’s only been a half-hour or so. It merely seems like centuries…
To paraphrase The Other Half, “I don’t believe that Ryan Gosling is an actor, let alone that he’s Neil Armstrong.”
I don’t think that’s entirely fair. I met him a couple of times long before he became famous (like a lot of Canadian ex-pat actors, he was in some of the absolutely dreadful children’s TV we produce so much of[*]). He has a lot of screen presence and he’s good at emoting.
Most people don’t realize how much good direction and showrunning matters; by way of example, Battlestar Galactica was filmed in Vancouver with C-List Canadian actors (don’t try to translate that to an American or British scale; your alphabets don’t go that far) who turned in performances that were light years beyond anything they’ve done before or since.
[*] See also Reynolds, Ryan
I know many of us are worried that the people on the Internet aren’t using enough drugs. The content of the following link should reassure you:
http://garfemon.tumblr.com/post/174902893870/i-dont-know-why-youd-want-this-but-if-you-doi
You’re welcome.
Most people don’t realize how much good direction and showrunning matters;
Yes, there is that.
“She will not be silenced”
Screams everyone who claims not to have a voice at a deafening volume over all formats and media 24 hours a day.
(Closely allied to “The Untold Story…” TV trope. e.g. “the untold story of the woman who…” or “the untold story of black man who…”, which almost invariably stories precede stories I’ve heard before more than once.)
Barbed wire telephony.
Narrator voice: “Later, Iowa became critically important in Presidential elections, and rural self-sufficiency soon fell out of fashion. Today, tens of millions of Americans continue to pay surcharges on their utility bills in order to provide cutting-edge technologies to out-of-the-way rural communities. Because jacking up the price of corn just wasn’t enough.”
“Where Canadians live.”
“Each Colored Area is Approximately 1/4 of Canada’s Population”
RACI… oh. On the map. Right. I knew that.
“Barbed wire telephony.”
Well, that’s my album title sorted. Now I just need to write some songs.
“How exactly would roads designed by/for women differ from roads designed by/for men???”
*sucks teeth* Woooh… I dunno… Flowers? Scatter cushions?
“Small, portable gardens.”
Aha! There you go!
“How to run on all fours. Because apparently it’s a thing now.”
I find myself dreaming I’m doing this all the time. Can’t help thinking it’s some kind of deep-seated genetic memory sort of thing going back to the apes or something. ‘Cos there’s no way I could do it in real life.
“Over a third of us live in just three cities.”
And they’re all further south than anywhere in Britain. (Even Edmonton’s only on the same latitude as Leeds.)
“Thus, he became the first Indian to wire a head for a reservation.”
I’ve a vague recollection of hearing that one on an old Jack Benny radio show from the early ’40s. It bears repeating, though. 🙂
“I’ve spent the last few weeks clicking away four, five, even six goddamn boxes before being able to read a site’s content.”
All because the EU doesn’t know about this.
“’First Men in the Moon’ was a fine book and would make a nice steampunk-style movie now, in the hands of the right director.”
Aye, there’s the rub. Verne was far too pro-American for Hollywood. And all that stuff about a private members’ club raising the money through public subscription will have to go…
Re: First Man
When I was a kid, my dad worked for the military industrial complex, which included doing work for the space program. This resulted ultimately in an invite for him and his family to go to Cape Kennedy and watch Apollo 10 lift off from the VIP section.
Very, very cool. Got within 10 feet of Jimmy Doolittle and 100 feet of Spiro Agnew.
Later that year, with Apollo 11 on the pad, my dad decided it was time to buy a color TV because he wanted to see the moon in color.
Of course, the first broadcasts were in B&W, but we still had our magnificent console Magnavox TV.
Can you imagine what would happen if Germany moved 90% of its population to within 10km of the Polish border? Or if the Argentinians all camped out on the Chilean frontier?
Honestly, I don’t know how the Canadians get away with it.
Boat on a bridge.
“Roads designed by men are killing women”
The intended implication is that men are malicious and/or negligent. The retreat point for the headline writers, if they get called out for their hatefulness, is that they’re making two different statements, both true, and only a loser incel MRA would find it insulting.
How exactly would roads designed by/for women differ from roads designed by/for men???
To be fair, she says it in the article: they wouldn’t be roads, they’d be cycle paths. Female cyclists, she says, are less predisposed to assert ownership of a lane, meaning that they’re more likely to end up in the blindspot of a truck.
And just because you’ve granted her that premise in this particular context, don’t go thinking that deplorables like you can apply it in other contexts – for example, when commenting on the willingness or aptitude of women for being firefighters, professional athletes, or any other statusful or well paid occupation where threats to life and limb have to be confronted assertively.
If they were going to be thorough and holistic, they’d look beyond the white collar city planning jobs and examine the scandalous gender balance of road crews. Male-maintained roads might be good enough for male cyclists with boyhood experience of biking in the dirt and forest trails, but it takes a woman’s touch with the steamroller to finish off a road surface to the high standards of other women.
Life Lessons: Don’t ever share your password with your girlfriend … ever.
Life Lessons: Don’t ever share your password with your girlfriend … ever.
Today’s words are complete, utter and bitch.
Life Lessons: Don’t ever share your password with your girlfriend … ever.
Mothers should really warn their sons about the existence of such women. It should be a thing, a tradition.
Mothers should really warn their sons
THIS
(no sons, but I have grandsons (now 15 y/o) and we’ve had these kind of discussions… I’m going to make them read this)
“Don’t ever share your password with your girlfriend … ever”.
It is very hard to not generalise and become a misogynist. I must confess that I’m even angry on his behalf and I’ve never laid a finger on a clarinet in my life.
I suspect this lady has also moved on without a care in the world.
I suspect this lady has also moved on without a care in the world.
I’m guessing she remains a miserable, neurotic mess, who can’t look at herself in the mirror, but will continue to spread her misery and insanity to those around her. Which is why it remains so crucial that fathers tell their sons to “never stick your dick in Crazy.”
Most people don’t realize how much good direction and showrunning matters;
Which reminds me that I’m still irritated by Blade Runner 2049, which, like the original, had bled me of all interest, such as it was, after about an hour. Someone should tell Mr Villeneuve that a glacial, drama-killing pace does not equal profundity.
Life Lessons: Don’t ever share your password with your girlfriend … ever.
Mothers should really warn their sons about the existence of such women
To be fair, this should be communicated from fathers in tandem with “always wear your raincoat”. IYKWIM.
To be fair, this should be communicated from fathers in tandem with “always wear your raincoat”.
I was assuming mothers (or grandmothers) might have some additional insight, being womanly and all.
Which is why it remains so crucial that fathers tell their sons to “never stick your dick in Crazy.”
Knowing how to identify crazy before it bites would also be useful. The internet seems to be providing some information on that topic nowadays (lots of YouTube videos on reading women). Getting horny young men to pay attention might be challenging though.
I was assuming mothers (or grandmothers) might have some additional insight,
My advice to my daughters: If he says don’t worry, I’ll pull out in time he may be sincere, but it’s not going to happen.
My advice to my grandsons: If she says don’t worry, [I’m on the pill] [it’s not the time of the month were I can get pregnant] [I know you’ll pull out in time] she may be sincere, but always wear your raincoat.
Advice to both: Don’t sleep with crazy … the experience that night is never worth the days that follow.
OH CRAP …. I forgot to close the italics tag
I’ll just be over here on the stool of shame …
Knowing how to identify crazy before it bites would also be useful.
“Society is far more comfortable with teaching women about the dark side of men than vice versa.”
https://youtu.be/8eGwjqh_eQQ
Because, as above, there will be other victims.
Our bien pensant progressive betters don’t care.
It’s becoming clearer and clearer that all the left’s insults – racist, sexist, homophobic, Cuthbert, Dibble and Grubb – are just insults.
Change “insults” to “defamation”. The left is intent on destroying careers, reputations, lives.
Yet men feel like the mere entertaining of the idea that the average woman (not just the mythical “bad girl”) can have an unsavory side will transform them into instant misogynists.
It always amuses me, and not in a good way, how even very intelligent women (or so my deluded cis male brain has been trained) will be surprised to hear of a nice guy (nice, but too boring and/or socially awkward for they themselves to ever take seriously) falling for the Whore With A Heart Of Gold.
I was assuming mothers (or grandmothers) might have some additional insight, being womanly and all.
Yeah. I could see where one would think that. But consider the economics. Who has the incentive to want grand babies and who has the disincentive for supporting such.
Somewhat tangential but the best advice I’ve ever heard from father to son was from a buddy of mine’s dear old dad who said, “Son, God only gave you one of those things. Don’t stick it anyplace it might rot and fall off”. Father knows best. I’ll just get my hat…
Next up, Woody Allen as Patton.
Well, come to think of it, for several decades, we have had Woody Allen as James Bond . . .
Most people don’t realize how much good direction and showrunning matters;
Summoned To The Black Tower
Hal has inspired me. Probably some here have read the following, but it’s Harlan Ellison’s account of him as a writer for Disney. For 1/2 day. It’s “3. Labor Relations”, the third account on the page below. Of the other two, the first is also funny. The second is definitely not.
http://www.harlanellison.com/iwrite/mostimp.htm
Jennifer Lawrence was very good in “Winter’s Bone”.
I don’t think she’s been anywhere near as good since.
Ok, I have to crow a bit. Wanna know who taught Armstrong to land vertically?
Google images “Fred Drinkwater Neil armstrong”
Google images “Fred Drinkwater Neil armstrong”
Ayup, assorted variations of Yes, small world. do occur with great regularity . . .