Friday Ephemera
Spot the error. || The thrill of beavers. (h/t, Elephants Gerald) || Bold statement. || Baggage of note. (h/t, Ben) || New job. || Not yet junk. || Incoming. || Needles and a bag of shit. || Assorted things, close up. || Reviews of U.S. national parks, presented as catchy posters. || Assorted historical photos, from adhesive bras and polar bear mascots to the making of Godzilla, 1954. (h/t, Things) || Dad skills. || A little anxiety. || She’s “an avian-human hybrid” and she wants you to memorise her pronouns. || I was previously unfamiliar with the breast paradox. || Women’s football match interrupted by something more interesting. || And finally, for a moment there, I wasn’t quite sure what it was he was making.
Spot the error.
Textbook schadenfreude — so much laughter on my part, so much pain (and some pieces) on his part. I definitely won’t take any pleasure from seeing the “after” photos from his visit to the hospital.
Not yet junk.
Sigh. I had some fans that still worked perfectly after 60-70 years. They just don’t make ’em like they used to.
Reviews of U.S. national parks, presented as catchy posters.
Reviews by Calvin when he was older?
Spot the error.
Did you notice the name of that Twitter account?
Avian-human hybrids reminds me of Robert Altman’s film Brewster McCloud, a film whose premise sounds romantic but ends up being quite creepy and disturbing (spoiler here).
the breast paradox
This will require much careful study.
Women’s football match interrupted by something more interesting.
[ Ponders trying that ploy. ]
Cthulhu or Dr. Zoidberg?
Salvador Dali in Zimbabwe?
What percent of slum dwellers are not criminals?
The Lionel Richie/KISS mash-up you never knew you needed:
https://twitter.com/danceyrselfdean/status/1541963831424999425
Adhesive bras
Previously I pointed out that human breasts were not perfect hemispheres. However, neither are they perfect cones, which leads me to believe Mr. Langs had no first hand experience with them.
adhesive bras
I’m betting he tried this scam before “fitting” his bras.
Women’s football match interrupted by something more interesting.
Anything is more interesting than women’s football.
Just like Toledo, Ohio. They’ve got entertainment to dazzle your eyes go visit the bakery and watch the buns rise.
A new word for me today ptosis
To be used with discretion…
Adhesive bras
Worn under backless evening frocks, thus defeating the whole purpose of a garment meant to demonstrate that the wearer’s breasts need no support. Also worn by actresses supposedly topless viewed from behind.
They’ll never catch on.
Needles and a bag of shit.
Bad place to wear flip-flops.
A little anxiety.
Okay, that was stressful.
“Reviews of U.S. national parks, presented as catchy posters.”
Oh, my, that’s sublime!
Morning, all.
The Lionel Richie/KISS mash-up you never knew you needed
Oh, that’s nicely done.
Okay, that was stressful.
[ Places phone on satin cushion, carefully removes stray particle of dust. ]
Oh, and another racist, sub-literate “equity” advisor.
Mr Rodriguez hasn’t yet mastered basic grammar, or indeed coherent thinking, but he does know that the secret to career advancement is to insult parents and to disdain white people at every opportunity.
Children in the district of Columbia’s public schools are so lucky to have him.
More dad skills.
K-mart used to have the best fans. I have a bunch of them, up to 45 years old and still work.
When the revolution comes, I want that guy who bought and destroyed K-mart to be the first one on the train to Siberia.
Bold statement.
? How do you even get to be that shape?
Bold statement.
It’s a rejected outfit from the movie Mahogany.
for a moment there, I wasn’t quite sure what it was he was making.
At the 12 second mark…
Speaking of bold wardrobe solutions.
Bold wardrobe solutions
This person is more usually be be found online extolling the virtues of “pup sex” as evidenced by many lurid photos.
Rarely can so many boxes have been triumphantly ticked by a single hiring. Dr Rachel Levine, the 4 star admiral who looks like Penn Jillette in the year 2030, appears normal by comparison.
Rarely can so many boxes have been triumphantly ticked by a single hiring.
Well, I don’t know about the “pup sex” thing – I haven’t seen – but it must be quite strange, possibly demoralising, to share an office with this person and to be obliged to pretend that nothing is amiss.
If there’s a breast paradox, then there’s gotta be a butt paradox, too.
I demand answers.
This young miss is exhausted after a day of work.
I demand answers.
That is because you weren’t properly educated.
“The thrill of beavers.”
Ditto. (It’s kind of SimCity with water management. And rodents.)
“Reviews of U.S. national parks, presented as catchy posters.”
Where’s the “Rate this review as useful” button?
This person identifies as a bird and uses ey/em/eir pronouns because birds don’t inherently have a gender
Birds are very, very obviously sexed. Has ‘Camryn’ spent any time around birds at all? (And who’s ‘Avery’? Is this a parody?)
Breast paradox: there is indeed a butt paradox, as Burnsie asks. No other mammal has females with such gorgeous butts. Why? Turns out there is actually an answer: A fatty acid crucial to brain development in the fetus is stored in the butt. So in a Darwinian sense, a cheerful butt means smart babies.
Incidentally, I’ve noticed that the heart shape for valentine’s day is a perfect replica of a woman’s rear end. It looks nothing like a heart. This is also the real reason why men let women go through doors first.
Also from the historical photos archive, some unhappy food adverts.
Note the newborn-baby-in-cellophane, and the butter-bare-buttocks combo.
The avian-human hybrid lady advises us on how best to pick up her preferred pronoun use: “…so the best way I think to practice is to write out … a couple of short sentences…”
I wonder if anyone likes her enough to tell her that she’s not quite fascinating and attractive enough to expect people to practice as a condition of her friendship.
and the butter-bare-buttocks combo.
“It’s better with butter”
Did you notice it’s the ref and the Chilenas giving out the tummy rubs? I think Bonzo was lucky the Venezolanas didn’t invite him back home for a barbecue.
Since we’re on the subject of barbecues, that Georgian Outlier in the scatterplot is easily explained away – large posteriors are not something you have to search the web for if you spend any time at barbecue places.
“It’s better with butter”
[ Rummages under bar for bigger, more ostentatious pair of spectacles. Peers over them. ]
I’ve noticed that the heart shape for valentine’s day is a perfect replica of a woman’s rear end.
I take it you didn’t see David’s 3rd link…
I’ve noticed that the heart shape for valentine’s day is a perfect replica of a woman’s rear end.
I’ll wait for a historical study of the development of the Valentine’s Day heart shape: Other origins seem possible.
This young miss is exhausted after a day of work.
That’s gotta be a troll. And in no way is she in “tech”, she’s excited about starting a marketing job.
Other origins seem possible.
I’ll go with crappy medieval anatomists and sacred heart renderings. Take out the flaming aorta and there it is…
Anything is more interesting than women’s football.
I’m by no means an expert on the sport, but even I can see a marked difference in the speed of play, and in the level of skill. I’m actually a little surprised there’s any audience at all for women’s football. I mean, it’s like actual football, but much worse.
Friendly dogs, on the other hand, are hard to resist.
Unhappy food adverts are still worth us… Kellogg cereal anyone?
Turns out there is actually an answer: A fatty acid crucial to brain development in the fetus is stored in the butt. So in a Darwinian sense, a cheerful butt means smart babies.
The things you learn here. And delicious bar snacks, too!
And delicious bar snacks, too!
[ Orders even more absurdly large spectacles from Amazon. Peers over them. ]
but even I can see a marked difference in the speed of play, and in the level of skill.
I get anxiety watching them slooooowly get to the ball. I can’t help the feeling that the defender will get to it well before the “controlling” team. There’s not enough scoring in soccer as it is. Though AIUI women’s goals per game are ever so slightly higher than men’s when teams are evenly matched.
Well said …
“It’s better with butter”
Shades of Last Tango in Paris
The bird lady: well, she does have that AWFL (Affluent White Female Liberal) quacking manner of talking. ?. She should identify as a duck.
I still think people like this are merely having fun seeing how much their acquaintances will put up with. I was ahead of my time when I was a cat for a week. (I was 3 or 4–my parents and brother said “That’s nice.”)
https://www.theamericanconservative.com/dreher/toronto-cops-look-for-bearded-woman-transgender/
You know, Rod emphasized the funny side of this, but it might not be so funny if the person is in danger, or dangerous, and people who may have spotted “her” are confused and don’t report.
The progressive retail experience 436.
and in the level of skill.
You can see more skill and speed on display at any local soccer pitch at the boys midget (16-years-old)level. It’s been reported that women’s national teams lose to elite 16-year-old boys teams.
“This is also the real reason why men let women go through doors first.”
You’re also less likely to get slapped in the face for ogling a woman’s backside. Well, not by the woman you’re ogling, at any rate…
“Other origins seem possible.”
I think it was the comedian Sue Perkins, who is of the Sapphic persuasion, who pointed out that it bears an even cruder resemblance. In some cases. I, er… think I’ll just leave it at that, eh?
“Also from the historical photos archive, some unhappy food adverts.”
I can’t help thinking of the classic Viz parody: “They’re happy because they eat LARD”. (Link to T-shirt because I can’t find a legit link to the original. It would appear some of the younger generation are labouring under the impression that it’s genuine, bless ’em.)
“Well said …”
Spot-on. It’s horrifically racist. But somehow okay because Lefties.
An imortant point, that’s often forgotten (or deliberately swept under the carpet): the Democrats claimed to oppose abolition on the grounds of compassion. How dare the heartless Republicans turn these poor innocents out into the harsh, dog-eat-dog world of the white man? The plantation owners are giving them food and shelter! How can they be expected to fend for themselves? Don’t their lives matter to you?
The attitude really hasn’t changed much.
To those in The Great White North, happy Canada Day.
Make sure you wear black bloc, antifa, or “pride” gear so the fines don’t apply…
A fatty acid crucial to brain development in the fetus is stored in the butt. So in a Darwinian sense, a cheerful butt means smart babies.
So the mother of veritable Einsteins then?
I think it was the comedian Sue Perkins, who is of the Sapphic persuasion, who pointed out that it bears an even cruder resemblance.
I first heard that back in the 80’s. This “fact” was always stated with the supreme confidence that we now associate with Facebook commenters.
To those in The Great White North, happy Canada Day.
Do your part to build cross-border comity: Walk up to Canadians and congratulate them on being America’s upstairs neighbor.
To those in The Great White North, happy Canada Day.
I love the fact that the environs around the House of Elites in Ottawa are now being referred to by some wags as “Tiananmen Hill”
And in no way is she in “tech”, she’s excited about starting a marketing job
She works at LinkedIn, which is a social network company. Nearly all social network companies are way past their “difficult engineering” phase, which means all the real engineers have left.
I still think people like this are merely having fun seeing how much their acquaintances will put up with
The term of art is “shit test“.
it might not be so funny if the person is in danger, or dangerous, and people who may have spotted “her” are confused and don’t report
The term of art is “demoralization“.
now being referred to by some wags as “Tiananmen Hill”
We have security checkpoints for Dominion Day now.
Nearly all social network companies are way past their “difficult engineering” phase, which means all the real engineers have left.
Heh. Yeah, the difficult engineering thing…First of all there was no real “engineering” to begin with except at the network/volume/hardware levels…sometimes if even that. Though the other charlatans may call themselves “engineers”. The real world software development process for most new products, social network or not:
First of all there was no real “engineering” to begin with
Please stop embarrassing yourself. Stoll’s Syndrome is real and help is available.
Has anyone seen this woman?
Jordan Peterson on his ongoing Twitter suspension, an event mentioned here recently.
Walk up to Canadians and congratulate them on being America’s upstairs neighbor.
Actually, I met a young American man in my local LCBO (government run liquour store) who asked me for my advice on Canadian Whisky (please note no “e” like Scotch Whisky). He was very nice and apparently very excited to be celebrating his first Canada Day. He was certainly more excited than I was.
Oops. Princess, I didn’t see you had already posted. Great minds think alike, and all that. 🙂
More on trans activists and child molesters. Without following the link, this reminds me of those disturbing revelations about Alfred Kinsey.
“It’s better with butter…
Shades of Last Tango in Paris”
Hmm. Someone else take a crack at that?
*ducks*
[ Searches Amazon for ‘Hamster Urine Super Soaker’. ]
Speaking of bold wardrobe solutions.
You lot are being to hard on the guy, is a truly Deep Thinker™.
Still searching Amazon.
You lot are being to hard on the guy, is a truly Deep Thinker™.
[ Abandons search for Super Soaker. Begins search for dunk tank. ]
You can see more skill and speed on display at any local soccer pitch at the boys midget (16-years-old)level. It’s been reported that women’s national teams lose to elite 16-year-old boys teams.
Indeed. A few years ago the Matildas (Australia’s national female soccer team) were defeated by the Newcastle Jets under-15 boys team 7-0.
A shame the Newcastle Jets under-15 boys never had the chance to match up against the FC Dallas under-15 boys (who soundly thrashed the US women’s National team).
The entire woman’s game has refrained from any subsequent self-inflicted humiliations. Pity, we could always do with a good laugh.
She wants to show you her hair.
You can see more skill and speed on display at any local soccer pitch at the boys midget (16-years-old)level. It’s been reported that women’s national teams lose to elite 16-year-old boys teams
It’s a rule of thumb for team sports involving a ball- decent team of 15 year old boys will beat an elite womens team.
I don’t say that disparagingly of women’s sport- I spent several very enjoyable years coaching my daughter’s team, as girls and then women.
I still occasionally watch women’s teams (not in soccer- not mad on the game) but not under the illusion that this is equivalent to that sport played men.
It’s just biology.
Vive la difference.
She wants to show you her hair.
Great googly moogly, “Trauma holder, age slider”. All this time I though an age slider was a week old White Castle. Is there no end of their making shit up?
Do follow the links at the the link above to go down a rat hole of inanity, e.g., agehazy.
That is some fine frontier gibberish.
Personally I am pissed because there is no stripe on the goofball flag for them yet. Pure sliderophobia.
I went down the rat hole.
Headmate
Later that same day…
According to the “Pluralpedia”, “Alter is often a synonym for headmate,” so an alter can be a headmate, unless the alter needs a shrink. Got it. So how do the know ?
Silly me, I thought it might require a professional instead of a subliterate trying to read the DSM 5. Good news, though, the traumagenics have many flags”. One for each “alter”, I guess.
a truly Deep Thinker™./i
He couldn’t more shit immersed head down in a septic tank
oh dear
OK my head is deep in the pool of hamster urine
I hope
“Headmate”?
That’s nothing new…
Where’s the head mate?
*ducks again*
There’s nothing like an html error to teach humility. ?
Please stop embarrassing yourself. Stoll’s Syndrome is real and help is available.
Yeah…yeah…Maybe it’s the cactus in my ass (was it “in” or “up”?…I forget) but I’m not following how what I related in regard to the realities of developing software in an environment of ever changing and often never established specifications relates to a quasi-luddite argument that the internet was just a flash in the pan…or something. Not that the guy didn’t have some point that people do need to go outside and live real lives.
ageslider: no one feels their age. What does that even mean? Most people do not feel older as they age. Inside we are still 25 or 40 or whatever. Unless we did too much yard work and then wake up feeling 80. There is however a problem out there of people never growing up, never acting responsible. Being a parent but needing parenting.
As to multiple personalities, I think many cases (most?) are overly dramatic and give names to their different moods and elaborate these into persons. They are play-acting.
I think many cases (most?) are overly dramatic and give names to their different moods and elaborate these into persons. They are play-acting.
Change “many” and “most” to “virtually all” and you are spot on.
192 terms for “origin” of their “DID”.
Tumblr, you say? My surprise is overwhelming.
Various techniques – I am guessing that means “emulating other soulless gits on Tik Tok”,but I am not a Tumblr psychoanalyst, so I could be wrong.
One way to see what % of multiple personality cases are self-created is to compare before and after widespread media (including self-help books in the 80s-90s). Just like the massive increase in teen girls declaring that they are trans. Mass delusions.
“Tulpamancy”
Hmm. Add a “u” and it’s Dutchy.
“Tulpamancy”
Hmm. Add a “u” and it’s Dutchy.
–And should remind us of the (in)famous Tulip Mania.
Run for your lives!
Run for your lives!
What? You’ve never seen a Chernobyl deer before?
You lot are being to hard on the guy, is a truly Deep Thinker™.
Bigots.
WTF is this?
backhoe and fireworks: chinese gov I think trying to tear this guy’s house down and he is fighting back with fireworks. Backhoe backs into a hole.
ccscientist: Thanks.
Live not by lies.
In the long run Twitter will be remembered, as Torquemada is, for the inquisition rather than any redeeming virtue.
https://twitter.com/Wtfportland1/status/1543012260330672128
Restrained and civilized insofar as neither of them got a deserved punch in the nose.
The heroine no doubt adept at discerning the slightest dogwhistle of Hate among whites, no doubt ready to share a teachable moment about trenchant language being a sign of closed minds and a precursor of conflict, but will she draw any conclusions from the explicit anti-white hate expressed by the Mexican, or whatever he is?
Does this sort of experience make her revise her conviction that the contradictions and tensions of a multiracial state can be managed by enlightened schoolmarming, by making Brad and Becky wait their turn and coaxing Jose and Latisha to speak up but in indoor voices?
With all of her education in intercultural sensitivities, when will it dawn on her that the white schoolmarm tone is very badly received in other cultures? It’s an irritation and a provocation to everybody, but non-white men aren’t socialized to put up with it like white men are, and non-white minorities have the demographic wind in their favor not to need the mentorship of these busybodies like they used to.
Bigots.
I know, right, advanced degrees make you smaaart, totally immune to woo, and qualified to be in any government position.