Earthquake Machines
Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez has accused the United States of causing the devastating 7.0 magnitude earthquake in Haiti, which killed possibly 200,000 people. Chavez believes the U.S. was testing a tectonic weapon to produce eco-type devastations.
Blimey. One wonders how this revelation will go down among the Great Man’s admirers here in the UK.
But I’m confused. I thought only “The Jews” had such diabolical technology. As revealed in December 2007 when Hamas MP Ahmad Abu Halabiya informed Al-Aqsa TV that,
It is not impossible for the Jews to generate an artificial earthquake… in order to accomplish their goal of destroying the foundations of the Al-Aqsa Mosque.
Needless to say, The Guild of Evil™ has been conducting research of its own with this mobile apparatus.
Update: Not what it seems, it seems.
“One wonders how this revelation will go down among the Great Man’s admirers here in the UK.”
The Guardian’s been going down on Chavez for years. They’re not going to stop now.
“An adoring audience of British left-wingers and the Latin American diaspora cheered, clapped, sang and laughed as Venezuelan president Hugo Chávez denounced President Bush and capitalism… The Camden centre in north London is usually home to trade fairs, conferences and school exams, but yesterday it throbbed with calls for a new world order.”
http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2006/may/15/london.politics
I suppose this is no worse than his praise for Carlos the Jackal, Robert Mugabe and Idi Amin:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/nov/22/hugo-chavez-defence-carlos-jackal
“One wonders how this revelation will go down among the Great Man’s admirers here in the UK.”
And his groupies in Hollywood…
http://www.moonbattery.com/archives/2009/09/the_chav_pack.html
I suppose it’s a compliment that even those who hate us have such a high opinion of our rectitude that they can believe (or claim to believe) that we have this apocalyptic technology but that we won’t use it against them.
I believe Chavez erroneously refers to the Norwegian Climate Altering Device (http://www.daily.pk/norway-time-hole-%E2%80%9Cleak%E2%80%9D-plunges-northern-hemisphere-into-chaos-14311/ ). The NCAD is for peaceful climate-alterations only, and will be employed only to offset the Norwegian CO2-emissions. Earthquakes are only a theoretical side-effect, and according to our local press, no connections have been proven. Or even discussed, for that matter.
We trust our American masters in this.
So should you.
Yours,
-S
Good point, Jason, but for real fun I can take it further. Remember, we Americans also caused the 2004 tsunami and all those hurricanes (OK, maybe we just intensified the hurricanes…no wait, we did cause a few extra ones in 2005). Plus think about how our clandestine organizations and our State Department pull the strings of other leaders, even in the (supposedly) democratic countries. We’re downright god-like in our powers. Bwahahaha. OK, maybe we’re one of those lesser gods, specifically the kind that only cause trouble, like some sort of plural Eris. Kinda cool if you think about it that way. It’s all in the packaging, you know.
If you really want to see Chavez get his cajones polished you have to read the Democratic Underground. The Gaurdian doesn’t even come close.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102×4229316
Of course, the usual gang of idiots are claiming that HAARP caused the Haitian earthquake:
http://www.bing.com/search?q=%22haiti+earthquake%22+%2B+haarp&go=&form=QBRE&qs=n
Of course, it also caused the 2004 Indian Ocean earthquake and tsunami, and the severe winter weather over the whole Northern Hemisphere this past month… well, you get the picture.
Line left off my previous comment (my fault):
Chavez is a little late jumping on that bandwagon.
I wish the US actually did have an earthquake machine. Bush would have shaken Big Hugo out of bed every night. He and Cheney could have watched live on satellite while high-fiving each other.
What, no Weather Dominator jokes?? This place is losing its edge 😉
The Russians agree with El Presidente Loco, Haitian earthquake a run up to a pending tectonic attack on Iran by the United States.
http://www.digitaljournal.com/article/286296
Norman
There was no “severe winter” over the Northern Hemisphere this winter. It was, in fact, an unusually mild and warm one. All of the official organisatations have all the latest technology and processes to measure it as being so.
To say otherwise suggests to me that you are in the pay of the Oil Lobby and other Far Right Organisations.
Jonathan Frantzen, (author of The Corrections) wrote about earthquakes induced by oil drilling. “Strong Forces”. Fanciful, but well (no pun intended)worth a read.
Don’t laugh. Nikola Tesla built one in 1912 — in New York.
http://www.excludedmiddle.com/earthquake.htm
“Update: Not what it seems, it seems.”
Perhaps, perhaps not. From your Harry’s Place link:
“What is plain is that it was reproduced by “community-controlled [read Chavista], government funded [read state propaganda arm]” Channel Vive TV (Note the prominence of the logo of the government’s “Communication and Information” Ministry). Given Vive TV’s disposition towards the government, it is highly unlikely that it, or its controllers in the ministry, found this story offensive.
The article appeared in the newspaper ABC in Spain, which referred to this story on Vive TV’s website. If you search around the website, you will find that it is possible to comment on stories, but their origin is, as you would expect, controlled by Vive TV itself. No byline of ‘Patria Grande,’ though this phrase, often capitalized, is used frequently in Chavista propaganda. No sign of individual posting. No sign of open access policy except to comment on the story – and the comments change as the party line changes. Of course the ABC article makes no reference to ‘patria grande’ either, despite the claims of chavista bloggers like El Polvorin.
So it seems that this is an official story in an official arm of Venezuelan state propaganda. It doesn’t mention Chavez, so it is possible that someone has embellished the story here. It doesn’t mention ‘patria grande,’ and this seems to be an invention of chavistas trying to disclaim the original story.
This story has been exaggerated in a few directions in its retelling, and HP, rightly, has apologized for this. But it is unquestionable that the story started as an official story of Vive TV, a channel which declares itself to be promoting the achievements of the Bolivarian Revolution.”
I reckon someone lent Hugo a DVD of ‘The Core’.